tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27510781466043573292024-03-05T09:28:46.099-05:00The Yoga BagTHE YOGA BAG = Yoga (The pathway to integration and stilling of the mind and the practice of self-love) + Bag (a non-rigid container)
Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.comBlogger126125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-84501957518834074132018-09-26T16:13:00.001-04:002018-09-29T15:04:34.284-04:00What to do if You have Been Assaulted and are Triggered by the News<br />
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">What to do if You Have Been Assaulted and
are Triggered by The News</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">The Yoga Bag</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">Catherine Cook-Cottone</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">2018</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">Why I am writing
this: </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">While growing from a little girl to a woman, I was both sexually assaulted and physically assaulted. As I write, my stomach and heart ache and tears flood my
eyes. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">That said, it is
part of who I am. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">I think I am
like many women out there. I care about what is happening in the news. However,
the news is very triggering. I find myself torn between wanting to know the
developments day-to-day and trying to get through my work and life tasks. I effort to get up every day and get my
work done, engage in my relationships, and manage the resurgence of traumatizing
memories and waves of emotions. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">I find that I am at a place
in which I need to gather together my coping strategies- so that they are here
for me. I am writing to share them with you. So that WE have a plan. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">To do this, I reached back
to a post I wrote about coping shortly after my mother died. I am inspired by
my 2015 self and her strength. I wrote the 2015 post less than three weeks after her
passing. In my 2015 post, I spoke of the moment when my parents told me my baby brother was diagnosed with Down Syndrome. I spoke of the moment I heard my mom had, at-best, 3 years to live. There are these moments in our lives and they come in waves. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">When I wrote in 2015, I felt much like I do now. I was deep in one of those waves. I was going through the daily motions of life and wondering
if I would ever feel okay again. Back then, I wrote about the hardships I had experienced
in my life- a list. I wrote about how I was not special- that life is complicated,
and messy, and sometimes really hurtful and that – I—like each one of us- was a
bit bruised-up by it. still, despite the list, I did not refer to being physically or sexually assaulted-
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wrote this in the text— </span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">"And,
this is not all of it (some things simply must be kept private and sometimes
those ones are the hardest)." </span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">Today, I find it too
hard to carry this burden silently. Life gives us these chances, again and
again, to turn inward and heal the places where the wounds still ache.And so I take that chance. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">It seems as though, the way out
is still through and to heal I must feel. I know that this too shall pass and with my work,
it will pass best after I have integrated, processed, and experienced it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">By leaning in, I will
arise stronger. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman";">I have decided
to take what I learned in 2015 and expand the guidance for us.</span><span style="font-family: "times new roman";"> </span><span style="font-family: "times new roman";">Here is our
plan: </span>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Rally your kindest and most compassionate self.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Research suggests that if you coach yourself with
self-compassionate, caring encouragement using your own name, you providing
self-support that can move you forward. This is how it works, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Catherine, I hear you saying that you are
afraid that you will never feel okay again. I see your sadness. Remember,
Catherine, you are strong. You have your breath and your practice. You have
made it through hard times and learned and grown. Be present, feel, and
breathe. You’ve got this.”</i></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Take a news break.</span></i></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></i></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Take a break. Instead of turning on the news in the car or in the morning while you get ready for your day, play songs that feed your soul. Listen to a podcast that reminds you why you love and can trust humans. Take time with your loved ones-- with no background noise- just the humming of your life as it pulses with the heartbeats of the safe people in your world. You can go back to the news whenever you are ready. It is never required. You can always choose. </span></span></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Look for those who have made it and lock your eyes on them.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">By the time my brother Stephen had grown a bit and was doing
well in school, my mom went back to school to get her teaching degree. Sharing
the writing gene, she wrote about our family experiences and the birth of
Stephen. She wrote about Stephens’ birth and meeting a woman who also had a son
with Down Syndrome. Her name was Eileen Hyslop. Mom reached out to her. Eileen
generously talked to my mom at length and later became her dear friend. That
first day on the phone, my mom could barely hear what Eileen was saying because
she just heard her laugh, from the belly, from the soul, an authentic, happy
laugh. The sound of that laugh gave my mom hope. My mom thought for the first
time, in a long time, that maybe she would, in fact, feel okay again and maybe,
in fact, she would laugh, a real laugh again. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">There are women, heroes really, out there now, speaking of
their rapes and assaults with mind-bending courage within the #metoo movement.
There are community members and leaders who are feeling strong and supported
enough to voice support. There are people who have built their entire careers
on advocating for women and survivors. Like me, find those who have made it
through and lock your eyes on them. </span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Let your friends and family be there. </span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The days after I told my partner of seven years that I was
leaving were some of the hardest days of my life. I knew he deserved to be with
someone who loved him completely and I knew I needed to leave. That did not
mean that I didn’t love him very much. I did and leaving him was one of the
hardest things I have even done. I was floored by the feelings that followed.
One night, I felt as if I could not bear to exist. I didn’t want to die, but I
didn’t know if I could handle being present in all I was feeling. My dear
friend Lissa came over to my place with a novel in hand. The television was
off, no music, just me curled up on the couch and Lissa sitting on the chair next
to me reading. I didn’t know the story. To this day, I have no idea what she
was reading. Still, the sound of her voice and knowing I was not alone, got me
through one of the hardest nights of my life. I will be forever grateful. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">These days, I am relying on my running group, good friends,
and my husband. Jerry and I have a Netflix show we are watching, a gentle distraction.
I am working with my friends on an event for this weekend in support of a veterans
program. It is these close, trusting, and supportive moments that help you believe
in humans again. Reach out to the people in your life, your sisters and
brothers, family, good friends- those that won’t mind sitting and reading to
you, running with you, planning events with you-- while you work on breathing. </span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Listen to the stories and perspectives of others.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">This one was my daughter Chloe’s contribution. When I asked her
what she does to get through the seemingly unbearable, she said she reaches out
to others to get their perspective. She said that when she is too deep in
something, she loses perspective and only sees one side. When she reaches out
and listens, she hears other perspectives and possibilities. It has a balancing
effect. She says it gets her closer to what is really happening and out of her
reaction. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I guess old souls can be 16
year-old girls.</i> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">With a similar intention, the year I turned 40 I re-storied
my whole life in a series of journals. I interviewed my husband, my parents, my
siblings, and my friends and got their stories of my life. I detailed things
that made no sense to me when I was little and asked very specific questions.
All the notes are in journals that I still hold precious today. This process
was incredibly healing and “self”-organizing. I learned so much about my own
perceptions as well as the sides of stories that perhaps I could never have
known or understood as a kid. Not surprisingly, I was out-and-out wrong about
more than a few things. The whole process made me stronger, deeper, more
connected and integrated.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Read memoirs of survivors- <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Hole in the World: An American Boyhood</i> by Richard Rhodes is one
of the bravest books I have ever read. You can purchase it it<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Hole-World-American-Boyhood-Anniversary/dp/0700610383">
here</a>. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Lucky</i> by Alice Sebold tells the story of a young woman raped, only
later to find out he had killed before and was told she was “lucky” to have
survived. You can purchase <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Lucky</i> <a href="https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=lcuky">here</a>.
Dig in, be inspired, and feel. </span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Routine is your friend.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">When my Grandpa Cook died it hit me hard. He was the first of
my grandparents to pass. He meant a lot to me. He was a teacher to me on topics
ranging from how to recover from an eating disorder to maintenance of healthy
daily routines. I somehow felt safe just thinking about him digging around his
garden, making insane smoothies, and sitting and reading. To get through his
death, I stuck to my routine. I went to school. I went to work. I ran (no yoga
yet in my life at this time). My routine was my anchor. I said to myself, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Work is still here,”</i> “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">School is still here,”</i> and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Daily runs are still here.”</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Things had changed substantially and yet so
much was going to stay the same. I still find great comfort in that. </span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Use your planner, calendar, or other scheduling support
technology.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">In the research world, these are called cognitive
prosthetics (or neuro-prosthetics). Considered a tool for improved functioning,
technologies can help you “think” just as a prosthetic leg can help someone who
has lost a limb walk. For example, researchers are exploring ways that
technological tools can help those with Alzheimer’s function day-to-day. How
does this relate? When we are completely overwhelmed, we are at high risk for
flaking out. Under stress, your brain is flooded with stress hormones and there
is actual risk for cognitive impairment. Use your tools and give your brain a
break so that it can process what you are experiencing. You can enhance the
process by adding in reminders to do deep breathing exercises or reminders of
positive affirmations (e.g., an auto-reminder pops up to say, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“You are stronger than you think you are.
Breathe”</i>). Technology is a powerful tool for mental health. </span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Let your feelings move through you and breathe- breathe
deeply. </span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">You can’t think your way out of some things. It is simply
not possible. When someone dies, you can’t fix it, think about it differently,
nothing like that. It is loss, pure loss. It can’t be fixed. You can try to
think your way out of it- that path takes you into loops of rumination- because
it doesn’t really work. The feelings demand to be felt. As they wave in, allow
them. Put one hand on your belly and one hand on your heart. Feel. Deepen your
breath and stay present. These feelings are called emotions, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">e-motions</i></b>-
packets of energy and information (i.e., /e/) that move through you (i.e.,
/motion/). They tell us what matters. The remind us what is important. They
move us. Allowing and presence is needed for integration and processing of what
has happened. It’s a necessity. That said, take breaks. Alternate sessions of
being totally and completely in it with periods of support, friends, and
healthy distractions. When you are ready, allow again. That old saying is true,
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“In
order to heal, we need to feel.”</i></b></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Stay Sober.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">There is another old saying (from Alcoholics Anonymous),
“Nothing is so bad a drink won’t make it worse.” You don’t need to be an
alcoholic to benefit from that wisdom. Your brain and soul need to be sober to
process important things in your life. If you take yourself out with alcohol or
drugs during the hard times, you rob yourself of the chance too honor the
tragedy, loss, or important life event with pure, sober presence. Equally
important, if you drink, or use, every time you start to feel, it is difficult,
if not impossible to move forward. You get stuck. It bears repeating, that old
saying is true, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“In order to heal, we need to feel.”</i></b></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Write, write, write.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Writing about hard times can help you heal (read a
Psychology Today Piece here <a href="http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/write-yourself-well/201208/expressive-writing">http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/write-yourself-well/201208/expressive-writing</a>).
James Pennebaker, as researcher on the mental health benefits of writing found
that when individuals write about difficult events in their lives, include
specific details, and integrate their emotional experiences, they experience
increased physical and emotional well-being (read about James Pennebaker here <a href="http://www.utexas.edu/features/archive/2005/writing.html">http://www.utexas.edu/features/archive/2005/writing.html</a>).<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> </i></b>For
me, writing in my journal, writing a blog, or any writing at all are ways for
me to move thoughts and ideas through me. I love giving seemingly free-floating
emotions a home on a page- whether it be a webpage or a hand-made journal page.
My emotions seem to do better with a good home. Write, write, write. </span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Seek out nature.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Nature is medicine. Researchers are confirming what we all
already know: getting into nature is grounding, spiritually uplifting, and
healthy. I believe so strongly in this that I run to a local waterfall on a
regular basis. If I don’t get there once a week, I feel it in my body. I love
hearing the water rush over the rocks. I love seeing the trees grow and shed
their leaves, hearing the snow crunch under my feet in the winter, and smelling
the flowers in the spring. I love the birds, squirrels, and ducks that live
there. Once when we were in the midst of moving, I ran to the falls in a state
of exasperation with the unpacking. Sweaty, exhausted, I walked up to see the
falls, and rested my hands and chin on the safety fence. At that moment, I saw
the most beautiful thing. A blue heron was standing at the base of the falls
dipping his bill in the water and then looking up to the sky. Somehow, I knew
in that movement that everything was going to be okay. I didn’t take a picture.
I hold the image of that heron clearly in my memories embedded with feelings of
calm security. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The two weeks of my mom’s death, I ran or walked down to
Lyon’s Falls, the actual falls. I watched the water fall over the rocks. I made
wishing stone stacks. I noticed the roots on trees and the moss on rocks. I
felt the sand on my fingers and the softness of the sides of the riverbed under
my feed. I breathed in the fresh, snow-tinged spring air, and I cried. Yep,
nature heals. </span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The next possible thing.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">When I was an undergraduate, I did not love to clean my
apartment. I would be busy on swim team, school, and work and get over my head
with housekeeping. One Saturday morning I woke up knowing I had to get my
apartment in order. It had gone too far and something had to be done. I felt
frozen by the sheer magnitude of what I had to accomplish. I asked myself, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Catherine, what is the next possible thing
you can do?”</i> I answered, “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">You can put
your feet on the floor and get out of bed.”</i> I answered myself, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Yes, yes that seems possible.”</i> And so
it began. I asked myself if I could get this cup, this one cup, to the kitchen
sink and I answered myself that I could, in fact, do that. One little, tiny
thing at a time, I got my apartment clean. This strategy has come to serve me
in postpartum after a spinal headache and complicated recovery. It came to
serve me for many, many days when I was terrified that I would not get tenure
(I did). It served me writing my last book (e.g., <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“I can write this section, just this section”</i>). In Alcoholics
Anonymous they talk about one day at a time. For me, on some days, that is too
big. I ask, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“What is the next possible
thing you can do?”</i> That’s it. Do that. </span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Schedule pleasant events.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Since the 1980s, researchers have been documenting the
benefits of scheduling pleasant events. It is important that you see the two
aspects of this tool: (a) schedule, and (b) pleasant event. Each component is
important. In fact, planning the pleasant event (e.g., a vacation) may have as
much, or more, of a benefit than the actual pleasant event. Read the New York
Times piece on the benefits of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">planning </i>vacation
<a href="http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/02/18/how-vacations-affect-your-happiness/?_r=0">http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/02/18/how-vacations-affect-your-happiness/?_r=0</a>.
Next, the pleasant event is- well- pleasant. You don’t need to earn it or
deserve it. It is just healthy to do fun and nourishing things. I love to go
for a run in nature or hike. I love to go in our hot tub. I love to cuddle in
by the fireplace and write blogs. I love teaching yoga. I love group runs with
friends. I love yoga trainings (my brother said that I need to admit this is
yoga camp for grown-ups- I say training makes it sound legit). I plan
“trainings” and travel. I have been saving for and planning a trip to Italy for
almost 5 years. I hope to go this year, completely paid-for, no credit card
debt, and learn to cook authentic Italian meals in all different regions. Just
thinking about it makes me happy. (Go here for a list of pleasant events
http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/html/er_handout_8.html)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Practice and all is coming.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">When I found out my mom had Pulmonary Fibrosis, I deepened
my yoga practice. I recall sobbing in savasana with Susan Fain, the yoga
teacher, playing “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Awaken My Soul”</i> as
she gently pressed my shoulders to the floor (thank God for towels over the
eyes). Practice yoga, run, swim, or whatever physical practice centers you. The
act of being in your body and moving is essential and powerful. Recall the
section on emotions needing to move?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You
need to move too. You move, the emotions move, and integration of even the
hardest of stuff happens. Unlike substance use, a practice that allows you to
feel your body and your feelings allows the impact of hard times move through
you. Warning: each of these physical practices, if done with the wrong
intention- can work just like alcohol or drugs. You can use your yoga, your
running, your swimming to numb out the feelings- and if you do- well- re-read
the section on staying sober. It’s not a step forward. So move- YES- and move
with the intention of feeling and processing. Now, that will serve you. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Meditate.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">This one is not so simple as we talk about trauma. . </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">What I said before (2015), “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Start
meditating today so that when you need the skills you have them. During the
last weeks of my mom’s life, we had the privilege of taking care of her. Thanks
to Hospice and their wonderful care providers we were able to be at my parents’
home providing the care my mom needed. These times are so very important and
hard. I was able to use the skills I have practiced for years- breathing,
mantra, and focus- to stay present and experience all that there was to
experience. You see, the more you meditate, the more you have a felt sense that
everything really is going to be okay no matter what is happening. You have a
felt sense that we are all one and that we all come from and go to the same
place and that place is calm and full of love. Each day you practice you allow
yourself to get a closer- not to believing this, but knowing it.”</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">With trauma, it can be a bit more complicated. <a href="https://www.mindful.org/the-science-of-trauma-mindfulness-ptsd/">Here</a>
is a great article on trauma and mindfulness, “The Science of Trauma, Mindfulness
and PTSD” in <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Mindful: Healthy Mind,
Healthy life. </i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Here are the conclusions of David Treheaven, author of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Trauma-Sensitive Mindfulness</i> as cited in
his article, “Is Mindfulness Safe for Trauma Survivors?” In <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Applied NPT Magazine</i>- <a href="https://www.neuropsychotherapist.com/is-mindfulness-safe-for-trauma-survivors/">here</a>.
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Many who suffer under
the weight of traumatic stress respond favorably to mindfulness meditation. But
others may have a different experience, where the practice unintentionally
lands them in more pain. Mindfulness practice doesn’t need to work for
everyone, but I’ve become convinced that certain modifications to meditation
can support survivors, at the very least ensuring that they are not
re-traumatizing themselves in practice. Mindfulness meditation isn’t bad: it’s
powerful. And those of us offering it to others benefit when we continue
exploring its risks and rewards.”</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">So- find supportive, guided meditations and do what
feels safe and okay. I have created two series on Simple Habit for survivors of
trauma and sexual assault<a href="https://www.simplehabit.com/catherine-cookcottone"> here</a>. Read more
about our Simple Habit series on meditation for women on Medium <a href="https://medium.com/@simplehabit/the-ultimate-meditation-playlist-for-women-f6bb9395da4e">here</a>.
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Allow.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I am not about acceptance. Maybe for some things- for
others- no. There are things I do not and will not accept. Physical and sexual
assault- no. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">For most of the rest-- <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have found it to be good practice to allow.
Allow others to be on their own path. Don’t let your judgment, your ideas, your
concepts about where they should be and how they should be doing things to get
in the way of love and presence. It has taken me a while to get to this and it
is my practice. Allow. Allow. Allow. And then Love. Love. Love. I promise, you
will not regret this. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Look for meaning.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">This one takes a commitment to dharma- the concept that we
were each born with a reason for being and it is our path to find our reason
and express it. Seane Corn, a teacher of yoga, explains that the universe is
our teacher- always. She says that our souls are placed here on Earth to learn
and the life events that manifest as we move from day-to-day and year-to-year
are there to be our teachers. In my life, I have a sense that the universe does
not speak English, or any other human language for that matter. Rather, the
universe speaks in symbols and energy. That means that the universe is not
going to walk up to you and say, “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Catherine,
your brother Stephen was born to show you the beauty, love, and intelligence in
all human beings</i>.” Nope, I had to see, witness, share, experience, and
value all of that. There were no words. Just Stephen. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I have yet to figure out the big picture for why I was assaulted.
Maybe my heartaches and body aches were just collateral damage to other people’s
inability to manage their own hurt, drives, and struggles. Maybe it’s a reminder
of just how fragile we all are. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Maybe some things just happen. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">For certain, I did not deserve these hurts. I also don’t deserve
a life of ongoing replays of these horrible events either. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I deserve to move forward and live and love and laugh. And—that--
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will do. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Get professional help</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">. I have. Getting
help is one of the bravest, smartest, and deepest acts of self-care I have ever
accomplished. It has made all the difference. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">So there you are-- <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>our plan. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The way out is through</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> and getting
through can be manageable. It is not easy, but it can be remarkably simple- some of the most powerful things are- stay present and process- and know you and your beautiful life are worth the
effort. Your ability to stay present and move through the experience is a way
of honoring your strength. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">It is a way of honoring the journey of your own soul. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I hope you choose the path of presence. You are stronger
than you think and life is more beautiful than we can remember in the hard
times. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The way out is through. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Namaste, </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Catherine Cook-Cottone</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The Yoga Bag</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1Dgab1ZlBz8HboDRSSPIgoExvdA8SvXRPPX_EPXtf2n6cA1iMBH5U-ieyA5TWGEyvjxbm2nEZypgHY4doBxKmVdxJZPhs12jx1RB9b7lxGKbZzagthVlC4u6JGa6Xw30noWoA5Y0oDLPc/s1600/butterfly2-copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="542" data-original-width="840" height="206" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1Dgab1ZlBz8HboDRSSPIgoExvdA8SvXRPPX_EPXtf2n6cA1iMBH5U-ieyA5TWGEyvjxbm2nEZypgHY4doBxKmVdxJZPhs12jx1RB9b7lxGKbZzagthVlC4u6JGa6Xw30noWoA5Y0oDLPc/s320/butterfly2-copy.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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</style>Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-23281970038862351242018-07-27T13:22:00.000-04:002018-07-27T13:48:18.082-04:00A Cancun Resort Pool: A Complicated PoemA Cancun Resort Pool: A Complicated Poem<br />
<br />
<br />
Quiet softens her eyes to the pool floor as the anxious riser enters the water.<br />
Anxiety welcomes him for a swim.<br />
Each stroke a worry or a regret.<br />
<br />
Striving has been awake for a while.<br />
A girl and her father.<br />
He sits, an unkind coach.<br />
She pushes and pulls her way through through the pool- training.<br />
<br />
Self-care stretches and gets ready for her swim.<br />
A woman, two men work their way through laps.<br />
Thoughtful.<br />
Hearts pounding.<br />
Breathing.<br />
Quiet lifts her eyes to welcome them.<br />
<br />
The Sun moves from the pool's edge to warm the waters more directly.<br />
<br />
Routine’s alarm goes off.<br />
Couples, with teens in bed,<br />
or work-worries tucked tightly in their laptops,<br />
bring coffee and stand in the pool.<br />
Feet grounded.<br />
Soft voices.<br />
<br />
Fun begins to waken in the pool waves.<br />
His soft morning giggles move through the water.<br />
The Sun begins her dance on the pool water's peaks.<br />
<br />
The children come.<br />
Floaties because their feet don’t touch.<br />
Fun looks up and smiles, laughs, climbs the stairs, and jumps into the water.<br />
Splash.<br />
Teens check their cell phones.<br />
The bartenders arrive.<br />
<br />
Addiction and Party take a turn in their sleep.<br />
Their wake up call is next.<br />
Quiet looks for her book and her towel.<br />
Fun pretends Addiction won’t come to the pool today.<br />
<br />
It’s Complicated- invites everyone for a Margarita.<br />
Everyone but Safe and Sober join.<br />
Quiet pretends to drink and watches.<br />
<br />
The pool-side bar fills.<br />
Addiction is telling Fun a joke.<br />
He doesn’t get it right.<br />
No one notices that Quiet and Safety went to swim with dolphins.<br />
<br />
Love watches Drunk yell at her kids as they dive-<br />
<br />
— you are not supposed to dive.<br />
<br />
Love sends Drunk a prayer.<br />
Avoidance moves her seat.<br />
Judgement stays to watch.<br />
<br />
The group tours return.<br />
Centered invites them for a nice swim.<br />
The afternoon sun lights the other side of the pool's waves.<br />
<br />
Fun is getting tired.<br />
Addiction gets him a cup of coffee and a shot of tequila.<br />
<br />
Safety returns with Nourishment.<br />
They say it’s time for dinner.<br />
Before drinking his shot, Fun decides to go to dinner.<br />
Connection and Joy join for dinner.<br />
Leaving the pool, they eat and share and laugh.<br />
<br />
The pool-side bar closes.<br />
<br />
Addiction and Tension go bar hopping.<br />
So does Celebration.<br />
We just got married.<br />
We just got engaged.<br />
25 years for us.<br />
<br />
The pool empties.<br />
<br />
Quiet comes to swim as the shade makes her way across the pool.<br />
<br />
Solitude joins.<br />
<br />
The water stills and cools.<br />
The moon.<br />
The stars.<br />
<br />
And Quiet lifts her eyes to welcome them.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Catherine Cook-Cottone<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRo-sXWeW_O5wdTCx7dO_9Tya6AvaeppRG1pxrXDIC-vcTKmj1DXO4lopgwmfaBGtoIwa41pcWLJCsoGg7Ra-pY73_1tV_2BkMyDQURRdBGcDc4Fu8kxvOGD7tlsNHuS_BKNrjlY7zqSWw/s1600/CASAMAGNA.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="280" data-original-width="460" height="194" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRo-sXWeW_O5wdTCx7dO_9Tya6AvaeppRG1pxrXDIC-vcTKmj1DXO4lopgwmfaBGtoIwa41pcWLJCsoGg7Ra-pY73_1tV_2BkMyDQURRdBGcDc4Fu8kxvOGD7tlsNHuS_BKNrjlY7zqSWw/s320/CASAMAGNA.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-47093166688394967592018-05-19T21:56:00.002-04:002018-05-20T19:46:57.639-04:00It’s not Hurt People who hurt people, it’s Hurting People<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Cambria; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
It’s not <i>Hurt </i><i>People </i>who hurt people, it’s <i>Hurting People</i><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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For some years, the phrase “Hurt people, hurt people” has helped me to understand the <i>WHY</i> of some of the experiences in my life and in this world. But, lately, somehow it seems too simple. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Like this. I have met some amazing people who have been horribly hurt and they do not engage in consistent hurting of others. In fact, some of them live their lives teaching yoga in prisons, to victims of the sex trade, or to those suffering in other ways. They are thought-full, heart-full, safe and wonder-full to share time with. So, we know, for sure I know, that not all hurt people, hurt people. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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I think it is more nuanced. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Hurt- is an adjective. It describes a state of a person- a hurt person. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Hurting- can also be an adjective- but it’s verb-like. It is an active process- a hurting person. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I think <i>hurting people </i>are more at risk for hurting others- it is an active process. Hurting happens when the hurt has trouble being-a-thing-that-has-happened and keeps being a-thing-that-is-happening. <br />
<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Perhaps our most dangerous hurts are those we don’t even know are still hurting us. Those hurts create blind spots- the not-seeing-of-things that we erect grand defensive sculptures around. These defensive sculptures are built of rationalizations, righteousness, and reasons for why it is, or was, okay to behave the way we do. When we struggle like this- the hurt longs to speak- it wants to be heard and felt and processed. It’s a force. </div>
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With an inherent drive to be expressed and no other options, the hurt lives in our behaviors. With no satisfying resolution or true validation, the hurts act themselves out over and over. And because we have erected great defensive walls around our hurts, we believe our behaviors are justified. </div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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And- that mess- is a self-perpetuating strategy for hurting over and over and over. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The message -<br />
<br />
(1) Feelings and hurts demand to be heard.<br />
(2) The feelings and hurts that are not heard- <i>demand voice </i>in our actions.<br />
(3) You will screw-up over and over and over until you listen.<br />
<o:p></o:p></div>
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To get beyond the hurting, we need to <i>feel </i>fully and openly. We need to sit with our feelings until we get to know them really well, intimately. We want to make friends with our feelings, seeing them as allies and messengers. We want be good listeners and holders of our own pain- so our feelings don’t <i>demand voice in our actions</i>.<br />
<br />
When we do this, we get to know our hurts and our feelings. We learn the parts of feelings that are artifacts of our past, the parts that are right now and relevant to the current moment, the parts that are made of up our fears, and the parts that are concerns about the future. We listen. We learn. We see more clearly. Hurts and feelings that can be the messengers and allies they were meant to be, settle. With their job done, they rest.<br />
<o:p></o:p></div>
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The next time you hurt someone else or yourself, first, know you are lucky enough to be aware of what you are doing. Next, consider dropping the defenses and turn inward rather than blaming. Third, consider that the world does not need to be a certain way for you to not be hurting or hurtful—but maybe— just maybe-- <i><u>you</u></i> could be different in how you listen to and process your hurts and feelings, you can hold them, and you can effectively let them go. <o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Maybe then you can stop being a hurting person and start being be one of those heart-full, hurt people who help people. And that is a badass way of being. </div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Cambria; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
Catherine Cook-Cottone, PhD, RYT-500<o:p></o:p></div>
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The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></div>
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-62513851088533899442018-03-26T11:49:00.001-04:002018-03-26T11:58:29.110-04:00The Importance of Setting Boundaries<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
The Importance of
Setting Boundaries<o:p></o:p></div>
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I remember when I first took graduate work in the the field
of mental health. I transitioned from memorizing psychology terms,
classifications, and theories to learning the processes involved in mental
illness, mental health, wellbeing, and
healing. <o:p></o:p></div>
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A term I learned way back in the 1990s was <b><i>b</i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i>oundaries</i></b>. I had not considered such a
thing-- that each person, entity, even agency has boundaries and the way that
we co-exist without hurting each other or getting lost in each other is by
knowing and keeping our boundaries. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The field of recovery in trauma and sexual abuse digs deep
into boundaries. It is critical in re-setting or re-membering who you are after
trauma and abuse. These boundaries are the edges of self. For some these edges
have been betrayed, violated, or lost. For some, they never had a chance to
establish themselves. In therapy, we work to re-discover and re-build them in
the safety of a healthy relationship. It is really beautiful work. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Having and keeping healthy and functional boundaries is an
ongoing process. It is required at home within the relationships we have with those we
love and care for. It is required at work to make sure we work effectively and
safely as a team. In each domain or your life, boundaries are an essential piece
of living effectively in community—they are an essential aspect of connection. <o:p></o:p></div>
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As you work to set boundaries, it can become clear when a
person or entity is not honoring boundaries. You can feel them push at your
edges. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I always proceed with the assumption that the other does
not, perhaps, know about boundaries as a concept (as I had not known years
ago). Boundary conversations are not easy and often feel personal-- as in
essence- we are talking about where each of us begins and ends. Still, it is
good work to do and, like gardening, a constant work that is needed for us to
flourish. Its also formative work- that is- as we work together to understand
each others’ boundaries things might shift and move. When we work with each other
and with love- those shifts and moves, like a lovely dance, can be creative
beauty. <o:p></o:p></div>
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You can say, “Hey, I need to talk about x, y, and z and
where my work (or self, or love) begins and ends and your work (or self, or
love) begins and ends so we can work (or be and or engage) in harmony, safely,
and effectively. Here are the places I feel our edges are unclear (add your
edges stuff here).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When can you talk?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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Most people will honor this request. They will sit with you,
connect and work to honor who you are-- and you will honor who they are-- and
you will work together to honor the boundaries required for healthy wellbeing
for both-- for all. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There will also be those who do not want to talk about
boundaries for lots of reasons. Sometimes there will be those who do not hear
you or want to hear you. There will be those who misunderstand you or misperceive
your request. Some do not yet know. Some have no interest in boundaries. Some
do not want to be bothered by boundaries or have the resources for keeping
them. Some are too defensive, as they do not yet know who they are. <o:p></o:p></div>
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It is a process and we are all working on our own growth
timeline. And so, we honor their path as we hold ours. No matter the response,
remember-- it is always okay for you to do your boundary work. Always. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
To you I say, hold good. Take time to figure out YOU. Find
your edges- the healthy edges and work with those, the messy edges and clean up
those, the not-yet-existing edges and build those—and your creative edges-
those are the best and most beautiful—live those. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And know, in the process- your edges will bump
up against others’ edges and with big loving-kindness- <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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…..do your boundary work. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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Namaste, <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Catherine Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--StartFragment-->
<!--EndFragment--><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkd_kY5tXMdicypXAlCZQcTUbI6gexy5qMRAugxbKOxQpCthTn3ySraqnF86trpgGI1N4zO6z1Ce9y4GofJAQPG62FxCHmzyF9WDVRQfx-RKf2gNevCp581xzyvO3sTk8-7gBBG01Akeud/s1600/TownsendTN-003.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="250" data-original-width="188" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkd_kY5tXMdicypXAlCZQcTUbI6gexy5qMRAugxbKOxQpCthTn3ySraqnF86trpgGI1N4zO6z1Ce9y4GofJAQPG62FxCHmzyF9WDVRQfx-RKf2gNevCp581xzyvO3sTk8-7gBBG01Akeud/s640/TownsendTN-003.jpg" width="481" /></a></div>
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<br /></div>
Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-72808357240462007542018-02-05T11:35:00.000-05:002018-02-05T12:27:40.407-05:00The Risks of Contact <div class="MsoNormal">
I have the flu. It’s spread by contact. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I caught something else. Inner conflict. It’s a bit like the
flu- stuff comes in from the outside- through contact- and the fight, the
somewhat invisible fight- goes on inside- the energies and ideas deemed as good
waging war on the energies and ideas deemed as bad- like some kind of virus
battling it all out. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I spent a week in contact. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Talking to people from around the world. Getting, owning,
and sometimes abhorring my own privileges while at the same time angry at all I
have had to work through for access. Embodying both the cause and effect of the
problem. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I made contact. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I spoke when it was hard and my voice was shaking. I exposed
my self to the stuff that leads to inner conflict. I said things of which I was
sure and unsure of in equal measure. I held hands and hearts and worked hard
not to drop either or my own. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I worked hard to make contact. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I worked so hard to connect at one point someone had to hold
me so I could reach and I did and I held on tight- my reach only possible
through the support of others. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I got the flu. It is one of the risks of contact. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I also got
so much more I learned that if I put my hand out there someone will reach just
as hard and we can connect. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The flu was headed my way anyway. Probably got it on
the plane or handing my passport over and taking it back. And I easily fall back into
my privileged calling my doctor, using my insurance, and having access to my resources
to get well. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But the other stuff- the other thing I caught- insight- the
stuff of inner turmoil and growth. I don’t have doctors and insurance for that-
this one is on me and I am letting it sink in and move me- move me to a better
wiser place as a woman, mother, sister, and a sister in the sisterhood, and
researcher. Eyes-wide, heart churning. The flu-I will recover. This other- bigger
stuff- stay, please stay and make me better for it. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I made contact. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Catherine <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
#heretobe</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></div>
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-91779413019971948542017-12-29T15:13:00.002-05:002017-12-29T15:13:24.880-05:00Steps to Creating A Soul Nourishing New Years Resolution for a Great 2018! <h2 style="text-align: center;">
Steps to Creating A Soul Nourishing New Years Resolution for a Great 2018!</h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiUCm_Dz5EG7jAxUxULLdH-5rThM7Z4QKJMewc9tfKDzICWVwSUntFzz4UkqWctXa2oSIGP5EUu8y_UrY3-atwgRpA_L7HlDR2i7IPFuCMOpxFxkPYHHn0O1aJE5RiLaekCT7dyTCdeKYp/s1600/New-Year-Resolutions-You-Shouldnt-Make.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="775" data-original-width="1024" height="242" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiUCm_Dz5EG7jAxUxULLdH-5rThM7Z4QKJMewc9tfKDzICWVwSUntFzz4UkqWctXa2oSIGP5EUu8y_UrY3-atwgRpA_L7HlDR2i7IPFuCMOpxFxkPYHHn0O1aJE5RiLaekCT7dyTCdeKYp/s320/New-Year-Resolutions-You-Shouldnt-Make.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Creating a soul nourishing and sustaining New
Year’s Resolution is an ancient art. In fact, New Year’s Resolutions have been
around in some form or another since the Babylonians.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As an art form, the New Year’s Resolution has
had many years to evolve to a place of accessibility for all. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">The art form is ready for you and your success.
Below is a list of guiding Dos and Don'ts. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">First, clear a space (see
http://theyogabag.blogspot.com/2013/12/three-big-steps-to-being-up-to-amazing.html).
Then, the definition. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><i><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">A New Year’s Resolution is a </span></i></b><b><i><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 32.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">promise
to yourself</span></u></i></b><b><i><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> to engage in some form of self-improvement
during the New Year. </span></i></b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Breaking that down:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(a)</span><u><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></u><u><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 16.0pt;">P</span></u><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">romise:</span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> promise
(according to Mariam-Webster): a statement telling someone that you will
definitely do something or that something will definitely happen in the future,
an indication of future success or improvement, a reason to expect that
something will happen in the future;<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(b)</span><u><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"> </span></u><u><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 16.0pt;">E</span></u><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">ngage: </span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">to pledge
oneself, promise, to make a guarantee;<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(c)</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"> <u><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></u></span><u><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 16.0pt;">S</span></u><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">elf-improvement:</span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">
improvement of one’s condition through one’s owns efforts;<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(d)</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><u><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 16.0pt;">Condition:</span></u><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 16.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">the circumstances affecting the
way in which people live or work, esp. with regard to their well-being (<a href="http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/promise"><span style="color: #0000e9;">http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/promise</span></a>).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">To craft your Soul Nourishing New Years Resolution
you must-- make (engage in) a promise to yourself in order to improve your own
well-being. How do you do this?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">There is A LOT of research on how to improve your
own well-being. According to research it is very likely that as you improve
your well-being, you will be doing a lot of good for others. If you dig into
the research articles you will see that well-being has a ton to do with
gratitude, giving, generosity, health, and love. So here we go!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">1.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 24.0pt;"> </span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Do:</span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> Build a larger framework
for your resolution. </span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Everything from a yoga asana (pose) to a home is
strongest when built within a solid framework, a solid foundation. For
resolutions, it can be very helpful to begin by seeing yourself 5 years down
the road. Take your age right now and add 5 years (your age + 5 = X). See
yourself at X. What are you doing? Who are you with? What is the weather? What
is around you? How do you feel? Set this vision. Get out a journal or a piece
of paper and put your vision on paper. Write a paragraph describing your 5
years from now self (X). Create a collage of X. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Remember, you will be 5 years older in 5 years
anyway. So don’t let fear of aging stop you. It is happening. So what kind of 5
years older form of you (X) do you want to be? Doing nothing, holding on to
your same patterns is also a plan. Know that. If that is what you want,
perfect. If not, make a plan. From this plan, build your goals and then your
New Year’s Resolution. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">2. <b><u>Don’t:</u></b><u> Work from an anti-dream,
anti-goal, or anti-vision.</u></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Work from what you want to create not what you want
to avoid. If you want prosperity, say that. If you want sobriety, say that. If
you want contentment, say that. Work from what will be manifested and not what
you want to avoid. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">It is always good to have a sense of what you want
to avoid (e.g., debt, addiction, alcoholism, etc..). However, to be effective
you want to work from a place of creation. For example, as you work toward
presence and sobriety, as result you are not drunk and dissociated. On the
other hand, if you say, “I will not be anything like my Father,” you are still
beholden to the mold. It’s mirror image, still the mold. Create your own
vision, something new (I know there are some who say to do this [e.g., work from
an anti-vision]. You can if you if you’d like. It won’t be as powerful,
creative, or positive). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">You might need to clear a space for your New Year's
Resolution- see this post
http://theyogabag.blogspot.com/2013/12/three-big-steps-to-being-up-to-amazing.html<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">3.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 24.0pt;"> </span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Do:</span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> Envision yourself as
healthy and strong. </span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Healthy is beautiful. Healthy is beautiful. Healthy
is beautiful. Healthy is beautiful.</span></i><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">We are completely inundated with media messages
telling us that we need to be smaller, thinner, leaner, and-all-that. New
Year’s Resolutions and visions based on being smaller or closer to an idealized
media image-- backfire. Don’t do it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Consider the Health At Any Size Movement. Here is
an excerpt from their web-page. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">“<i>Let’s face facts.</i></span></b><i><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> We’ve
lost the war on obesity. Fighting fat hasn’t made the fat go away. And being
thinner, even if we knew how to successfully accomplish it, will not
necessarily make us healthier or happier. The war on obesity has taken its
toll. Extensive “collateral damage” has resulted: Food and body preoccupation,
self-hatred, eating disorders, discrimination, poor health... Few of us are at
peace with our bodies, whether because we’re fat or because we fear becoming
fat. <b>Health at Every Size is the new peace movement.</b> Very simply, it
acknowledges that good health can best be realized independent from
considerations of size. It supports people—of all sizes—in addressing health
directly by adopting healthy behaviors.” An excerpt from <a href="http://www.lindabacon.org/HAESbook/"><b><span style="color: #0000e9;">Health
at Every Size: The Surprising Truth About Your Weight</span></b></a> by Linda
Bacon, PhD. <a href="http://www.haescommunity.org/"><span style="color: #0000e9;">http://www.haescommunity.org</span></a></span></i><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">4.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 24.0pt;"> </span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Don’t:</span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> Base
your New Year’s Resolutions on deprivation, restriction, and withholding from
yourself. It backfires too. </span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">A good example is dieting. Dieting won’t get you
where you want to be. Here is one of the many reviews: <i>Long-term Effects of
Dieting: Is Weight Loss Related to Health?</i><b> </b>A. Janet Tomiyama, Britt
Ahlstrom, & Traci Mann (2013)- reference below. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Worse yet, in the restriction and deprivation you
will feel like you are restricted and deprived. Humans hate this. We fight
against it. We rebel. And guess what happens by January 15</span><sup><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">th</span></sup><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">? Yes,
you will have completely ditched all restriction-based resolutions and will be
knee deep in your anti-vision. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">5.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Do:</span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> Set your
sights on a practice that enhances well-being.</span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Here are many, many ideas. Choose one or more and
set intentions to practice any one or more of these things often. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>a.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Embodied practices: yoga,
running, Tae Kwon Do, etc. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>b.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Meditation (go here for a great
app- https://insighttimer.com- I love this one)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>c.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Travel<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>d.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Communing with nature (e.g.,
hiking, bird watching) <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>e.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Commitment to a cause (e.g., the
Africa Yoga Project)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>f.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Religious practice <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>g.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Artwork (e.g., draw, take
photographs, make mala beads)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>h.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Music- listen, practice, create<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>i.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Writing- poetry, blogging,
journaling, etc.. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>j.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Family and friend time<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>k.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Set an amazing world changing goal with
specifics<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>l.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: Times;"><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">Be in Service- support others, lift the world up in some way (maybe help Yogis in Service, Inc. www.yogisinservice.org). </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">6.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 24.0pt;"> </span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Don’t: </span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Choose
something because you feel like you should. </span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Don’t choose the thing you think people will like,
approve of, or admire. Pick the thing that makes you excited, the thing you
want for you, the thing that makes you feel a feeling all around your heart
when you think of it (see [k] above). You were brought to this world for a
reason. We need you to manifest the reason for your soul. It will set you on
fire. Do that thing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><i><span style="color: #fff0c1; font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">"If you
are what you are meant to be, you will set the whole world on fire."</span></i></b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><i><span style="color: #fff0c1; font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">St.
Catherine of Siena</span></i></b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Note: There may be a few small goals you should
address first. It's okay, and maybe even good, to start small-- engage in small
accomplishable steps (e.g., eating vegetables twice a day, hydrating each day).
These smaller goals are the foundational work for larger dreams. Create the
foundation first. </span></i><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">7.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Do: </span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Find a
Partner</span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times;"><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">I joined Snyder Running Club a few years ago. We post our runs and get each there to get out there and run in the hot and the cold. It is the community that keeps us going when the love-of-the-run is elusive. We have gained so much more than running form this club- life long friendships and many, many fun times. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">8.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 24.0pt;"> </span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Don’t: </span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Set
standards so high and so pure that a human being can’t be successful. </span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times;"><span style="font-size: 16pt;">Weave in struggle. Make promises you CAN keep. In 2009, my sister and me made a commitment to daily exercise. In order to help us be </span><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">successful, </span><span style="font-size: 16pt;">in the
making of our commitment contract we wove in human error. There is room for
missteps and life that allows us to pursue this goal and be successful. Here
they are. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(a)</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Each week you get a skip day<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(b)</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Every six months you can burn two
skip days a week<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(c)</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">You need only do something
physical for 30 minutes and that counts<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Another example- I set a goal in 2015 to meditate
108 days before the new year. I set guidelines giving room for error (i.e.,
room for success). <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Important to my
success, I had a make-up rule- that is- I could meditate for twice the amount
the next day and not consider missing a set-back. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">My husband has a great way of looking at it- he
says, "I just need to see someone is trying. That is all that
matters." Yep- I had most certainly been trying for 108 days!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">9.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Do:</span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> Write it
down or get an app</span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Make it yours, own it, and write it down. There are
lots of ways to do this. You can use an old-fashioned pen and paper. You can
keep a log on your computer, or a blog on the Internet. I put mine in the front
cover of my daily planner and on my iPhone- there are apps…. (see below).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">“Goal setting involves establishing a plan and
creating steps to help you achieve what once was just a dream. Two vital parts
of achieving your goals are motivation and habit building. Thankfully there are
some apps that will help you create some healthy new habits that will move your
life in the right direction to help you achieve your goals. We compare the best
ones in this AppGuide.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">http://appadvice.com/appguides/show/habit-building-apps<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">10.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Don’t:</span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">
Automatically Keep your New Year’s Resolution a secret or tell everybody</span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">As an impulse or mindless action, neither of those
is a good idea. Your New Year’s Resolution is yours. It is yours to share or
keep for as long as you’d like. Choose thoughtfully, mindfully. If you share,
choose to share with those who will empower you. Sometimes it helps to hold it
close to your heart. I like to do this. I set goals and sometimes-- I don’t
tell anyone. It is between me and me (and me and God). After I have
accomplished my goal, sometimes I tell my husband or a friend. Sometimes I
don’t tell anyone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is one of those
things that varies person to person. As much as I like to keep things to
myself, other people do better when they share their goals. Share goals only
with people who will let it be yours. No matter which you choose, make sure it
stays your goal and your commitment. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">11.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 24.0pt;"> </span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Do:</span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> Mix great effort with
great rest. </span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Make sure you have built restoration and recovery
time into your plans. I say this over and over in my yoga classes, <b><i>“With
great effort, take great rest!”</i></b> You can Google, study, and research any
great man or woman and you will see that sustained effort was paired with
support and periods of restoration. I have taught the History of Psychology for
many years at the University at Buffalo. What I have noticed is that longevity
and impact, without tragedy, was paired with a restorative life. The moral of
the story, if you want to do great things and have a great life, match great
effort with great rest. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">12.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"> </span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Don’t:</span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> Make
your goals someone else’s job. </span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">It is so easy to tell a bunch of people, your
partner, a best friend what you want to do and then make it their problem to
monitor you, remind you, and inspire you. You are giving your success away and
people find this annoying (unless they are co-dependent and even then they
should not be doing it). It’s your resolution, your job, and your success when
you get there. And trust me, it feels amazing to set, work for, and accomplish
a goal. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">13</span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">. </span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Do:</span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> Make it
concrete</span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Make your New Year’s Resolution concrete. Do not
create broad open-ended New Year’s Resolutions like, “I will love others more”
or “I will contribute to world peace.” These are good ideas AND they can also
be concrete. For example, “I will love others more” might translate to, “I will
call my dad and mom every Tuesday and Thursday to check in and tell them that I
love them.” Also, “I will contribute to world peace” might translate to, “I
will volunteer to teach yoga at the youth detention center one hour a week.”
Those things are real, concrete. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Like my sister and I did with our exercise plan, we
said exactly when it started (that day), how often (6 or more days a week),
what (30 minutes or more of physical exercise including walking), and a
monitoring system (text each other the workout each day). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">These examples are so specific there is no question
of whether happens or not. For my sister and I, sometimes we check on this or
that asking if the other thinks that a particular thing counted. Usually we
agree that it counts because it meets our basic criteria- 30 minutes of
exercise. Please note, we excluded house-cleaning. That does not count- see how
clear we are? That is how clear and concrete you need to be. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times;"><span style="font-size: 16pt;">As I write, I have written 6 books. I did this all, one word, one </span><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">paragraph</span><span style="font-size: 16pt;"> at a time. I make a </span><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">commitment</span><span style="font-size: 16pt;"> to write for a </span><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">certain</span><span style="font-size: 16pt;"> amount of time, a </span><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">certain</span><span style="font-size: 16pt;"> amount of days per week, </span><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">depending</span><span style="font-size: 16pt;"> on the time of year and my commitments. I don't try to "write a book" that is too big and abstract. I would toward tangible hours </span><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">writing</span><span style="font-size: 16pt;"> and sometimes- I set a goal to get an idea </span><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">across</span><span style="font-size: 16pt;"> on paper. </span><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">Something</span><span style="font-size: 16pt;"> like, "Today I will write until I have laid out what it means to be </span><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">secular</span><span style="font-size: 16pt;"> when delivering yoga in schools." In these ways, my plans are concrete and </span><span style="font-size: 21.33333396911621px;">accessible</span><span style="font-size: 16pt;">. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">14.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 9.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Don’t: </span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Base your
goals or resolutions on resentment or showing someone something. </span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">I did this for a while. I fueled my achievement
with anger. Anger is not a half-bad fuel. But it burns dirty. You are left with
your achievements in your hands and black smoke everywhere. Goals built on “I
will show you” lack the shine, the inner glow, and the love that you see in
victories that come from the heart. Work on your anger, process it, and let it
go. Then, build your dreams on something more beautiful than anger. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">And this- You might need to clear a space for your
New Year's Resolution- see this post
http://theyogabag.blogspot.com/2013/12/three-big-steps-to-being-up-to-amazing.html<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">15.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 24.0pt;"> </span><b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Do:</span></u></b><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> It for love</span></u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Ah, this is the stuff. <b>LOVE.</b> Build your
resolutions and goals on (a) what you love, (b) for love, and, (c) on love of
life. Not only will this be more pure and light and beautiful. It will be full
of joy and fun. Goals and resolutions built on passion and love…….<b><i>well
that is the stuff of dreams.</i></b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">This is what I want for you. I want you to
accomplish your dreams- one goal, one resolution at a time- from a place of
love. So, <b><i>DREAM ON!</i></b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Have fun with these. We get this
one shot at life. Make it great. I am. </span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Your soul will love you for it. </span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><i><span style="color: #fff0c1; font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">"If you
are what you are meant to be, you will set the whole world on fire."</span></i></b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><i><span style="color: #fff0c1; font-family: Times; font-size: 24.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">St.
Catherine of Siena</span></i></b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Namaste, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Catherine<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">http://theyogabag.blogspot.com<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><u><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">References</span></u></i><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Long-term Effects of Dieting: Is Weight Loss
Related to Health? </span></b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">A. Janet Tomiyama</span><sup><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">1</span></sup><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">, Britt
Ahlstrom</span><sup><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">1</span></sup><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">, Traci Mann</span><sup><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">2,*</span></sup><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/spc3.12076/abstract;jsessionid=CC1FAF44A3FDD1965B4C69A1EE00684A.f02t04?deniedAccessCustomisedMessage=&userIsAuthenticated=false<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Abstract</span></b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">“Success” in dieting interventions has traditionally been defined as
weight loss. It is implicit in this definition that losing weight will lead to
improved health, and yet, health outcomes are not routinely included in studies
of diets. In this article, we evaluate whether weight loss improves health by
reviewing health outcomes of long-term randomized controlled diet studies. We
examine whether weight-loss diets lead to improved cholesterol, triglycerides,
systolic and diastolic blood pressure, and fasting blood glucose and test
whether the amount of weight lost is predictive of these health outcomes.
Across all studies, there were minimal improvements in these health outcomes,
and none of these correlated with weight change. A few positive effects
emerged, however, for hypertension and diabetes medication use and diabetes and
stroke incidence. We conclude by discussing factors that potentially confound
the relationship between weight loss and health outcomes, such as increased
exercise, healthier eating, and engagement with the health care system, and we
provide suggestions for future research</span><o:p></o:p></div>
Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-43006607205785730292017-12-29T14:14:00.000-05:002017-12-29T14:14:33.823-05:00How to Survive 108 Sun Salutations January 10th, Lafayette Hotel <div class="MsoNormal">
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><b>How to Survive 108 Sun Salutations January 10th, Lafayette Hotel </b></span></div>
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u><br /></u></span>
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u>What to expect:</u></span><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>A room full of happy yogis</li>
<li>Between 2 and 2 and 1/2 hours of Sun Salutations</li>
<li>The suns will start slow, expand to a challenging set of salutations, and then slow down at the end. </li>
<li>A lot of fun. </li>
<li>A raffle</li>
<li>T-shirt sales</li>
<li>Finishing card!</li>
</ul>
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u>What to bring:</u></span><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>Water bottle- bring between 20 and 40 ounces of water. You can refill at the 1/2 break</li>
<li>Electrolyte drink</li>
<li>Yoga mat</li>
<li>Hand towel</li>
<li>Mat towel</li>
<li>Cash, credit card, or checks for raffle/t-shirts</li>
<li>Your love of yoga!</li>
</ul>
<br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u>To prepare for a 2+hour practice/exercise (e.g., 108 Sun Sals): </u><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Just eat normally leading up to that day, maybe increase your calories a bit but nothing major. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">You do not need to eat some massive carb meal the night before, that will only hurt you the next day because your body will still be breaking that down and trying to eliminate it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Trying to drink excessive water leading up to that day to hydrate won't be additionally beneficial. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Add a bit more fluids each day, a bit more than normal and a bit more calories/carbs and you will be fine. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u><br /></u></span>
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u>What to do the day of the Suns:</u></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">The day of: I would eat a nice balanced full breakfast, get fats, carbs and protein. Examples. Oatmeal and fruit. Nut butter and toast with a banana. A green smoothie. Eggs, toast and fruit. Something along the lines of that. Keep it on the lighter side. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Start increasing your water a bit early on in the day. Something like 2 water bottles before noon. Have another done before 3pm.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Have a snack late morning. Greek Yogurt, some almonds or brasil nuts or dried fruit, or fruit. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Then, the key is to eat your next meal before 1:30, whatever you normally eat for lunch that works for you. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Have a small snack about an 60-90 min before 4:30 PM. Dates are great. A handful of granola. 1/2 an Avocado with a little bit of salt. Celery is a great natural electrolyte (e.g., maybe celery and a touch of hummus). <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u><br /></u></span>
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u>During the Suns: </u></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">During practice make sure you have a water bottle to hold enough water, either choose an electrolyte drink you always use or grab another brand, Vega products are good. Coconut water. Water is fine for at least an hour, your body doesn't really need to get any extra calories until after an hour of strenuous exercise. So even if you brought a Date or two, an energy gel, half a banana and took that half way through you will be fine. Depending on how long you have been doing yoga you may not need anything. Our bodies become efficient when we do the same exercises and we don't need as much. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u><br /></u></span>
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u>After the Suns:</u></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Post work out your most important thing is to replenish the carbs you lost, not protein. About 4 Grams carbs to every 1 Gram of protein. Or you can grab whatever makes you feel good. Get some carbs first and then add some protein. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Drink plenty of fluids later and you will be fine. You can add a touch more salt to your food to replenish your salts lost. (I know this sounds serious, I am just giving you the broad facts so you can take what you need for you). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Mostly, HAVE FUN and eat and drink enough. You can always take a break in child's pose and grab a drink at the water fountain. We will be pausing at 1/2 for drink, and bathrooms. Raffle results posted at end! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Can't wait to see you there!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;">The Sun Salutation Team, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
Catherine, Steve, Kathleen, and Leslie<br />
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Yogis in Service<br />
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0391 Washington St, Buffalo, NY 14203, USA42.8848743 -78.87289959999998217.3628398 -120.18149359999998 68.4069088 -37.564305599999983tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-53602132610975101652017-08-16T08:26:00.000-04:002017-08-16T08:28:38.519-04:00What have you been practicing for?<h2 style="text-align: center;">
What have you been practicing for?</h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Catherine Cook-Cottone</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
The Yoga Bag</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h3 style="text-align: center;">
This is the question of the week, </h3>
<h3 style="text-align: center;">
“If you wonder
what you would have done to help the Underground Railroad, the tireless mission
of the suffragettes, during the early years of the civil rights movement, or during the rise of
the Nazi régime— </h3>
<h3 style="text-align: center;">
know this- </h3>
<h3 style="text-align: center;">
you are doing it now."</h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Consider, that you have been practicing for today.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Consider, that yoga practice is not a practice of getting
really good at being really good on your mat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I guess it can be. Not for me. I am practicing to be the person I hope for
myself. To be silent now is to condone what is happening. To be in inaction now,
is to yield to those who are in action.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I grew up in the 1970s and 80s. As a military child, I lived
all over this beautiful United States of America. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
From coast-to-coast, I was raised to love and respect each
of my neighbors as fellow Americans worthy of every human right. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The daughter of an English teacher, I was raised to admire scholars
and poets for their ability to make art of their unmatchable paths in life-
never wanting any one of us to be too like another as it would dull the magic,
the beauty, the surprise inherent in our art and risk the vibrancy, the
source-threads that make up the glorious tapestry that is the narrative of the
United States of America. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I was raised to believe that the United States of America is
the safe place for people who weren’t safe other places. That we are that great
father and mother that hold out our arms for those who might be hurt or go
hungry somewhere else. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I was raised to see the wonder that comes from this kind of
open-hearted, open-armed love and acceptance that makes us all so much richer. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What I saw and heard yesterday was not the United States of
America that I was raised to know and love. And I knew, in my heart, THIS is what I have been practicing for. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I am practicing to support my commitment to our work in
Yogis in Service that connects all of us, from across this beautiful city of
Buffalo and over oceans from the Middle East to Africa- in service of something
bigger than anyone of us-- our love of and service in support of each other. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I practice to be the change I want to see in this world and
so that I will be strong enough to do it with grace. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I practice so that I don’t get tired, because I have a
feeling this is going to take some time.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I practice because you can’t give what you don’t have. Only
inner peace can support world peace. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I practice so that I am aware. So I can feel and see each
and every thing that is happening. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I practice so that I have the courage to say, “No, this is
not okay. This can’t happen. Not here. Not now.” <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I practice because I believe in me and us. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Why do I practice? <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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So I can keep working on love no matter what.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">What are you practicing for? </span></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">Catherine Cook-Cottone</span></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">The Yoga Bag</span></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-3465383938247833822017-04-05T12:51:00.001-04:002017-04-05T23:20:01.976-04:00Tools for Preventing Vicarious Trauma <div class="MsoNormal">
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In the past few weeks of my travel, I have met some very wonderful
people who are doing critical humanitarian work. Specifically, they work with refugees coming from the worst of
conditions (i.e., war, terrorism, and more). They feel the pain of so many, everyday, all day.<br />
<br />
We have been discussing the impact of vicarious trauma. This type of work exposes you to the trauma of others routinely. Often, you can only do your job, what your role entails-- when in truth so much more is needed. When you care, when you have a strong sense of mission- the gap between what you wish you could do to help and what is appropriate and required by your role is so big that you sometimes feel as if you might fall into it and not be able to come out. The feelings you take in everyday, you sometimes take them home, and sometimes- you feel as if they will live inside you forever. This experience can lead to burnout, yes; however it can also lead to vicarious trauma in which you begin to feel the same symptoms as those with whom you work (e.g., stress, overwhelm, hopelessness, and PTSD).<br />
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These
amazing humanitarian workers (world changers by the way) often feel like there
are few tools provided for, or taught to them to help them do two things: <o:p></o:p></div>
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</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Prevent the impact of vicarious trauma <u>in the
moment</u>, and <o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><u>Cope</u> with vicarious trauma once it has
landed in their bodies, hearts, and minds. <o:p></o:p></div>
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To help, I have created this list of tools for them (and for all of us). Please feel free to use this and share it. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">If you quote these tools please cite, Tools for Preventing Vicarious
Trauma by Catherine Cook-Cottone (2017), The Yoga Bag,
http://theyogabag.blogspot.com</i><o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Prevent Vicarious
Trauma in the Moment<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Stay aware that it is present. <u>Know when it
is happening</u>, “What this person is saying to me right now is emotionally
substantial. They are in pain. I see that. I feel that.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Notice any drive to rescue them. Do you wish
they were not feeling the way they feel? Now, remind yourself that feeling deeply
is important and it is not up to you to decide what and when another person
feels. In fact, you rescuing them from their feelings would not help them in
the long run. Rather, you sitting powerfully and steady, validating their feelings,
staying present and compassionate is <u>powerful and enough</u>.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Ground your feet on the floor and your hand(s)
on the table or chair. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Imagine the emotional content moving through you
and into the your notes from your pen, through your hands into the chair, or
through your feet into the floor. Do not hold it in your body. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Breathe in a 1:2, inhale to exhale ratio. Know
that the breath will help the emotions and trauma continue to move through you
and ground. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->See the bigger space, visualize all of the space
around the person allowing the emotional content of the room to have a grand
space to diffuse the intensity into (from Kelly Boys at http://kellyboys.org). <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Ride the wave of the emotion. Instead of getting
lost in it, imagine you are riding on the wave as it intensifies and grounds (Cook-Cottone, 2015). <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Take short reliefs or distractions from the
intensity of the experience, briefly look away or down. Allow yourself to move
in and out of the depth of the moment. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->As you speak to the person, think, “I wish this
person in front of me to be free from pain and suffering.” (for some it is
helpful to say a prayer). <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Have a reminder on your desk or on your person
of your “Why?”- a reminder of the reason you do what you do (a photograph, a word, etc.). <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Take time between each client to clear your
space. You might create a ritual of walking to a green/peaceful space, saying a
blessing, washing your hands and putting on lotion- something to clear the
space for you and the next person.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(see
next step). <o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->As you place your clients’ files away, imagine
that you are also holding the traumas and worries in the files and storing them
safely and confidentially in the file storage area (and not in your body, heart
or mind). I sometimes tell my clients that is exactly what I do. “I hold these concerns
and traumas in my office for you, so that you can let them go too.” <o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Before and After Care<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->At the end of the day ground the feelings you
are struggling to allow to move through you, into a journal, a box, or something else that is a concrete, tangible holding place. Add artifacts, stories, drawings to
your journal or box for safe-keeping. Close this box or journal when you are
done and tie it up with a string and put it someplace contained (a closet).
Allow this box or journal to hold your worries and concerns for you. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Balance work and rest. Balance means they have
equal weight. Be honest with yourself. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Take your vacations and sick days. Seriously, do
it! <o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Allow humor and positive emotions to be part of
your life. In fact, if they are not there, seek them out for balance. Keep
reminding yourself of the joy! <o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Engage in a <u>routine</u> of self-care
Practices (see Mindful Self-Care Scale; Cook-Cottone & Guyker here- <a href="http://gse.buffalo.edu/about/directory/faculty/cook-cottone-">http://gse.buffalo.edu/about/directory/faculty/cook-cottone-</a>
scroll for short and long-form of the scale). <o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Do self-compassion meditations often (see
Kristin Neff at http://self-compassion.org/category/exercises/)<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Connect with people who lift you up and help you
relax you while doing things not associated with work- seriously- not one bit associated
with work. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Make sure your activities and play outside of
work preserve your sense of identity <u>outside of work</u>. Who are you when you are
not at work?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(Do you do yoga? Are you into painting? Do you have a favorite
band? Do you love world music? What are your hobbies?…). <o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Use supervision (peer and hierarchical) to
process your experiences.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Add nurturing and caring features to your
workspace (paintings, comforts in the restroom [lotions], fresh water cooler, a
well stocked tea break area, plants, soft music, etc.). <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
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</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Connect with management and your team for an
ongoing assessment of workload. Confront this gently, but with honesty for
each other. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Include time to share success stories and
moments when <u>you felt your mission was lived</u> in meetings and staff
community time. <o:p></o:p></div>
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</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Provide/offer opportunities for non-counseling
work (workers give workshops to others, teach yoga to clientele, do web
development, keep a workplace garden, etc.).<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
Try all of this and I promise you will begin to feel better. Share the stuff that works. You are doing import work and we don't want to lose you to burnout, stress, or vicarious trauma. </div>
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For more see Cook-Cottone (2015) Mindfulness and Yoga for
Self-Regulation. Springer, NY. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Take good care of your self, so you can take care of others-
You can’t give what you do not have. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Much love, <o:p></o:p></div>
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Catherine <o:p></o:p></div>
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The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">If you quote these
tools please cite, Tools for Preventing Vicarious Trauma by Catherine
Cook-Cottone (2017), The Yoga Bag, http://theyogabag.blogspot.com</i><o:p></o:p></div>
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-16245552316384780532017-01-02T12:01:00.000-05:002017-06-04T09:26:55.441-04:00108 Sun Salutations Prep for 2017 Yogis in Service<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: center; text-autospace: none;">
Preparing for Your 108 Sun Salutations<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: center; text-autospace: none;">
Written by Steve Procknal & Catherine Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
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<tr><td><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9mVhQdqu3ZiHa5uztF9Q4Y4hL4C4iYdNffAljFtoDY9rGWoaGugiN29Xph8iHWVVcAusSk1Q4-P2cuQjLE4tDdpjL3PCoozkkWneCA6vqlZR6V1yalCyGxzPMqY2n4Ccbz4EbiTTxKKyy/s1600/Buffalo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="227" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9mVhQdqu3ZiHa5uztF9Q4Y4hL4C4iYdNffAljFtoDY9rGWoaGugiN29Xph8iHWVVcAusSk1Q4-P2cuQjLE4tDdpjL3PCoozkkWneCA6vqlZR6V1yalCyGxzPMqY2n4Ccbz4EbiTTxKKyy/s1600/Buffalo.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="font-size: 13px;">Yogis in Service, 2017<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
</td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u>What to expect:</u></span><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>A room full of happy yogis</li>
<li>Between 2 and 2 and 1/2 hours of Sun Salutations</li>
<li>The suns will start slow, expand to a challenging set of salutations, and then slow down at the end. </li>
<li>A lot of fun. </li>
<li>A raffle</li>
<li>T-shirt sales</li>
<li>Finishing card!</li>
</ul>
<br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u>What to bring:</u></span><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>Water bottle- bring between 20 and 40 ounces of water. You can refill at the 1/2 break</li>
<li>Electrolyte drink</li>
<li>Yoga mat</li>
<li>Hand towel</li>
<li>Mat towel</li>
<li>Cash, credit card, or checks for raffle/t-shirts</li>
<li>Your love of yoga!</li>
</ul>
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u>To prepare for a 2+hour practice/exercise (e.g., 108 Sun Sals): </u><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Just eat normally leading up to that day, maybe increase your calories a bit but nothing major. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">You do not need to eat some massive carb meal the night before, that will only hurt you the next day because your body will still be breaking that down and trying to eliminate it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Trying to drink excessive water leading up to that day to hydrate won't be additionally beneficial. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Add a bit more fluids each day, a bit more than normal and a bit more calories/carbs and you will be fine. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u>What to do the day of the Suns:</u></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">The day of: I would eat a nice balanced full breakfast, get fats, carbs and protein. Examples. Oatmeal and fruit. Nut butter and toast with a banana. A green smoothie. Eggs, toast and fruit. Something along the lines of that. Keep it on the lighter side. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Start increasing your water a bit early on in the day. Something like 2 water bottles before noon. Have another done before 3pm.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Have a snack late morning. Greek Yogurt, some almonds or brasil nuts or dried fruit, or fruit. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Then, the key is to eat your next meal before 1:30, whatever you normally eat for lunch that works for you. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Have a small snack about an 60-90 min before 4:30 PM. Dates are great. A handful of granola. 1/2 an Avocado with a little bit of salt. Celery is a great natural electrolyte (e.g., maybe celery and a touch of hummus). <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u>During the Suns: </u></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">During practice make sure you have a water bottle to hold enough water, either choose an electrolyte drink you always use or grab another brand, Vega products are good. Coconut water. Water is fine for at least an hour, your body doesn't really need to get any extra calories until after an hour of strenuous exercise. So even if you brought a Date or two, an energy gel, half a banana and took that half way through you will be fine. Depending on how long you have been doing yoga you may not need anything. Our bodies become efficient when we do the same exercises and we don't need as much. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;"><u>After the Suns:</u></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Post work out your most important thing is to replenish the carbs you lost, not protein. About 4 Grams carbs to every 1 Gram of protein. Or you can grab whatever makes you feel good. Get some carbs first and then add some protein. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Drink plenty of fluids later and you will be fine. You can add a touch more salt to your food to replenish your salts lost. (I know this sounds serious, I am just giving you the broad facts so you can take what you need for you). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Mostly, HAVE FUN and eat and drink enough. You can always take a break in child's pose and grab a drink at the water fountain. We will be pausing at 1/2 for drink, and bathrooms. Raffle results posted at end! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: 13pt;">Can't wait to see you there!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<span style="font-size: 13pt;">The Sun Salutation Team, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Catherine, Kathleen, and Leslie<br />
<div>
Yogis in Service<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
</div>
Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-53189142765896791272016-12-31T18:03:00.001-05:002017-01-01T20:03:41.908-05:00From Yoga, I Reach<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From Yoga, I Reach<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My feet. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My feet pressing
firmly into my mat,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I know the smooth,
the sticky, and the grit.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I know the Earth beneath me. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Pressing firmly into
my past, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I know the heartache,
the soul-ache, the life-ache.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From my feet, I
reach. </div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My legs. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I hug in from my
skin, to my muscle, to my bones. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
The same bones I
have, in past, forgotten.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
The same bones, from
which I have asked too much. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
The same bones I have
stressed to break.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From my bones, I
reach. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My belly. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
With feet grounded
and legs strong, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I find the very core
of me.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I pull in and up.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I lift my place of first connection to my heart.</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From the place where I
know things,</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
when I really know. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From my belly, I
reach. </div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My lungs. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
With my lungs, I
breathe </div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
The breath of life.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I breathe the outside
in and inside out.<br />
I am my breath.</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Big belly breaths from
my feet to my fingers. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From my breath, I reach.
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My heart. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Dhakdak, beat. Dhakdhak,
beat.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My heart carries the
world through my veins <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
And takes me to the
world. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I reach
into my heart, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My place of second,
and third, and fourth, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
And all connections. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From my heart, I
reach. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My throat.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I speak here.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I feel words both
spoken and unspoken.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I feel the words that
strangle me with their urgency.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I feel the words that
close off my breath with regret. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Here, now, from yoga,
I reach.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My voice feels free
and true<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Anchored to my feet,
bones, belly, and heart.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From my voice. I
reach. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My thoughts.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
For so long, I
thought they were me. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Each one, me.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
This me of thoughts floated,
struggled.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Was deeply sculpted and cut by <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
All of the words.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From yoga, I see thoughts are not mine.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I choose the ones I
want to hold.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I free the rest. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From my thoughts, I
reach. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My feet.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My bones.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My belly.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My heart.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My lungs.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My voice.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My thoughts. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From yoga, I reach.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My arms extend from
my core.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My eyes look upward.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Knowing what is me
and what is not me.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Embracing my pains
and joy, past and present.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Digging into the
beauty and truth of this moment.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From yoga, I reach.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Catherine Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjF8BgDbQZ8_C8UzViQwjvpcJs5lxPX36iYtJ1tBstJsY1uKHhjnN0ZmB4jZAkN3U384T4nMlU754D97w8as6MzUBoxd2bHKPBZBSG2NoZ8GQv74iPtwrjnxTO86uSKiCPuTjCMLsWf1xKo/s1600/shaman-hands-over-sun.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjF8BgDbQZ8_C8UzViQwjvpcJs5lxPX36iYtJ1tBstJsY1uKHhjnN0ZmB4jZAkN3U384T4nMlU754D97w8as6MzUBoxd2bHKPBZBSG2NoZ8GQv74iPtwrjnxTO86uSKiCPuTjCMLsWf1xKo/s320/shaman-hands-over-sun.jpg" title="" width="239" /></a></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-71010609328256454022016-12-24T14:25:00.000-05:002016-12-24T14:26:22.977-05:00Let Go and Be the Soul of It All!<br />
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<br /></div>
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<b>Let Go and Be the Soul of It All!</b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Catherine
Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p></div>
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The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></div>
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The holidays are like ringing bells.</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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They ring from this present moment, out into the snow, the
rain, even the sunshine- depending on where you are. The bells of the holidays
also ring foreword and backward into the holidays-yet-to-be and from holidays-past.
In this way, the present moment, in its essence, is all places and all times. <o:p></o:p></div>
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A beautiful thought. <o:p></o:p></div>
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In this truth, the holiday bells ring in the memories
of all of those we have lost. They are still here; in cookie recipes, songs, traditions, family stories, and memories. I think it is for these reasons that the holidays can be
difficult, even triggering for some. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I know for me, it is the first Christmas that I will not be
with my family. With the death of my mom in 2015, things have changed. Our home
in Lyons Falls is no longer our gathering place, making it hard, even impossible
for us all to gather. I find that each song, each baking of a cookie, each
flicker of a light from the Christmas tree makes my heart happy and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">ache</i> in equal measure. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Heartfelt aches, ugh, they hurt deeply. It takes presence,
work, and intention to feel and process it all. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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In the past few days, within the context of the abundance of
love and kindness all around, I have seen and heard stories of people –
well - being sort of mean to other people. </div>
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I have a mantra I save for those moments,
“hurt (or hurting) people, hurt people.” I use this mantra to bring the
compassion to my heart, to steady the moment, and to be the change I want to
see in the world (and I thank my yoga practice everyday for making it possible
for me to actually pull that off more times than not). Sometimes I wish we could all visually see the pain in each
of our hearts so we could understand the <i>why’s</i>.
For some, the hurting can be so big that we want those holiday bells- that tug at our hearts- to just stop,
“Shhhhhhh, it hurts.”</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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For some, in the overwhelm- we snap, we push others away,
and we hurt people who we don’t know. We even hurt people we love. I know, Lord knows,
this work of life is not easy. Most certainly it is not as easy as the holiday songs make it seem. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I was running with my friends this morning- after a
wonderful yoga class. We reflected on what might be a worry or hard over the
next few days (Thanks Michelle). We acknowledged the possibilities. Then, we
each described how we wanted to fill the space of the holidays (the stuff you
can actually control). We described our heartfelt intentions. We chose how we
might ring this year’s holiday bells. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I remembered Rumi. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Wherever you stand,
be the soul of that place.” <o:p></o:p></div>
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Even thought I miss my mom and my family, even though my
heart literally aches to not see my brother Stephen and the rest of my family
this holiday season, I can be the soul of this place—right where I stand. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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I can light candles; bake cookies; cuddle; smush my nose
into our dog snowball's fur and remind him how much I love him; tell Chloe, Maya,
and Jerry how much I love them (way too many times); and stop to facetime my
family and pause to talk to mom- cause I know if there is anyway she could stop by
for a visit with any one of us, she will. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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With that, the echoes of ringing bells from 2016, when they
are heard decades from now, will be bells filled with the sounds and memories
of presence, love, and peace—because I chose to be the soul of that place. <o:p></o:p></div>
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With much holiday love, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Catherine <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-9286967658341287692016-03-31T12:32:00.000-04:002016-04-07T15:06:12.418-04:00What is Holding you Back? (or Little Frog, Me, and Lots of Love and Yoga at the White House)<style>
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<div align="center" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">What
is Holding you Back? </span></div>
<div align="center" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">(or
Little Frog, Me, and Lots of Love and Yoga at the White House)</span></div>
<div align="center" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Catherine
Cook-Cottone</span></div>
<div align="center" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">The
Yoga Bag</span></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">What is holding you back? </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Wait. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">First things first. What do you want out of
this one beautiful and precious life that you have? This is your<b> I WILL</b>
list. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Answer fully. Grab a pen and a piece of
paper. Make a list. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Now. What is holding you back? This is your
list of <b>WHY NOTS</b>. It is very important. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Answer fully. Make a list. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Now, take your WHY NOT list. Crumple it up
and throw it away. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Perfect. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">You are ready NOW. Take your I WILL list and
begin! NOW!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">When I was in my 20s, I noticed that those
who were up to big, gigantic things spent more time making their dreams happen
than making lists of why they couldn’t make things happen. We all have WHY NOT
lists. And- you have a choice. You can walk around with your WHY NOT list as
your guiding set of principles or you can lift your head and look your <b>I
WILL</b> list right in the eyes and make things happen. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">This might sound morbid, but I am not leaving
this Earth with a list of WHY NOTS in my hands. Nope, like my daughter told me
a few months ago, “<i>Mom, when you die, you are going to drop the mic</i>!” It
was one of the biggest compliments I have ever received! She is 100% correct. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">I had the tremendous honor to live <b>Bucket
List Dreams</b> on Monday, March 28<sup>th</sup>, 2016. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">I was one among a group of fabulous,
inspirational, fun, and full-of-love yoga teachers that taught yoga at the
White House for the White House Easter Egg Roll (called WHEER). We yoga-partied
for 13 hours straight. It was one of the best days of my life. And- it all
happened because I took my list of WHY NOTS, crumpled it up, and said, “YES!”
about 100 different times, to 100 different things, that led to that moment. </span><br />
<br />
<div align="center" class="separator" style="text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ7HHPLAi9OTyz6QqNPr__M-x9S7YM1ZSWuI83safMmolLzPyo47nNDFGv5kNsexo_k5qnaw50T-dwsAmJemGxRn2-D09kCx7gZkuEQuQUCfmN0nyucx3ind-Yd6zKNzLSRYZZNMUzF2m-/s1600/Smiling+Dancer+White+House.jpg"><span style="color: blue; font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt; text-decoration: none;"></span></a><span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;"></span></div>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2TysdhC-KgJJedl84LJ8CH_FAJN8sDU9c1TtEHKaib9Za0K1YMz6PziFTieUbuajlXxR6JV5f0j4zikobG7NJi_P3VkjVID5o8n0h57doGQhcZdTym_HEMtrNoiCRzo5NxGgBBh4I7gj-/s1600/Smiling+Dancer+White+House.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2TysdhC-KgJJedl84LJ8CH_FAJN8sDU9c1TtEHKaib9Za0K1YMz6PziFTieUbuajlXxR6JV5f0j4zikobG7NJi_P3VkjVID5o8n0h57doGQhcZdTym_HEMtrNoiCRzo5NxGgBBh4I7gj-/s320/Smiling+Dancer+White+House.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">When I think back to the stuff that has held
me back, my WHY NOTS, the periods of self-sabotage and self-destruction, I know
the root cause- FEAR. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">My WHY NOTS represent all kinds of fear. I
have been afraid that I was not good enough, funny enough, pretty enough,
talented enough, smart enough, cool enough, loveable enough, kind enough, ---
all of the enoughs. I could never measure up. So- the good life, the living
your dreams life- that was for someone else- someone who was enough. I thought.
</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">I found the anecdote to my WHY NOTS, self
doubt, and fear. It is in the pages of one of my mother’s favorite books,
Jonathan Livingston Seagull. </span><br />
<br />
<br />
<div align="center" style="text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">“Jonathan,”
he said, and these were the last word he spoke, “keep working on love.” </span></i></b><span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;"></span></div>
<div align="center" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="separator" style="text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeI6K7_5T76jRZWNPAuH2iTzQOlE35YPQn5LLfjjcLPNtC6XBG-q36QDL3zZCdCWCLa1fbO9p5mGJRkBu14mmAaNsPyFtPX6myHEzw3swJlexHb0ujdCAivtS4NRmVJfl_vv7KS3u4J1R0/s1600/Jonathan+Livingston+Seagull.JPG"><span style="color: blue; font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt; text-decoration: none;"></span></a><span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;"></span></div>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhikVfJqtjP_V836OT5qIKgmh_f9gXn58xXlnHdEsguyaJYW-tbpvP4R0J3C6OBXnN2uieZN0Gb-3uAehHNwH_4NN_snqmRIuzv3PLvvsxAguZ-KBMcfDJEI0JsAXb4dmazxoUklcSPlWP9/s1600/Jonathan+Livingston+Seagull.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="149" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhikVfJqtjP_V836OT5qIKgmh_f9gXn58xXlnHdEsguyaJYW-tbpvP4R0J3C6OBXnN2uieZN0Gb-3uAehHNwH_4NN_snqmRIuzv3PLvvsxAguZ-KBMcfDJEI0JsAXb4dmazxoUklcSPlWP9/s200/Jonathan+Livingston+Seagull.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Those words are my guideposts. Whenever I get
in my WHY NOTS of doubt and fear, I say, “Catherine, keep working on love.”
Then I look up, and I WILL myself. I will myself into the moment. I will
myself to be present. I will myself to be curious. I will myself to be in
effort. And most of all, I will myself to be in the work of love. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">You see, in my fears I was somewhat correct.
There was a <i><u>not-enough</u></i> in there. There was not-enough love. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Now! That, I could change. That was on me.
And so I did. To this very day, I keep working on love which takes me to all of
my I WILLS and away from all of my WHY NOTS. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">I wanted the children I taught on the White
House to know about love and fear and being enough. So, I taught this
sequence. It is a story of a little frog Tadasana, who was afraid to
love. </span><br />
<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNF9xCnh712feeYnetYOPYE0oy79YfyLz8ZDIRXU4EP5hfdSmz3CK-vUEjdmd2YcTUJLL4P5KcyZvXyFDIiJ7u14_mfd9_Fil3lzoq9chKQJ0042_9OGIqc8toOasMhq6b2sl_Rdk2jCHZ/s1600/YOGA+TEACH+WHEER+2016.jpg"><span style="color: blue; font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt; text-decoration: none;"></span></a><span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;"></span></div>
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<br />
<br />
<div align="center" style="text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Little
Frog Sequence</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;"></span></div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">You see there is a lake in the Adirondacks
called Brantingham Lake.<br />
<br />
There are big beautiful mountains!<br />
<br />
- <i>Mountain Pose<br />
</i><br />
There are trees!<br />
<br />
- <i>Tree Pose<br />
</i><br />
And the sun shines over the lake! And it feels so good to do my morning
stretches and feel the sun!<br />
<br />
- <i>Stretch Up Reach for the Sky<br />
- Sun As<br />
</i><br />
At the lake we like to Swim and Canoe.<br />
<br />
- <i>Boat Pose with Paddling<br />
- Rock and Roll to Stand Up<br />
<br />
</i>There are dragon flies that hover over the water.<br />
<br />
<i>- Airplane- Both Sides<br />
</i><br />
And frogs!<br />
<br />
- <i>Squat and Hop All Around</i></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Stand up and feel your heart. Feel all of the
love in there? I want you to meet Tadasana Frog. She has love in her heart too,
but she is struggling to make friends because she is afraid. She is so afraid,
that her love doesn’t show. No one can see it. Has anyone here ever been
afraid? Raise your hands? Will you guys go with Tadasana to warrior school so
she can learn how to love without fear? (Thanks Corrie for being my Tadasana).
</span><br />
<br />
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<br />
<br />
Let’s go! Hop like a frog to warrior frog school.<br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">-<i>Hop Like a Frog</i></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">We have to paddle over the lake! </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">-<i>Boat and Paddle</i></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Past the fireflies!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">-<i>Airplane Both Sides</i></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Here we are!<br />
<br />
Do warrior one! And say, “I am strong!”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Same other side, “I am strong!”</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Do warrior one! And say, “I am brave!”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Same other side, “I am brave!”</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Do warrior one! And say, “I am love!”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Same other side, “I am love!”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;"><br />
Breath in strong and breathe out worries.<br />
Breathe in brave and breathe out worries.<br />
Breathe in love and breathe out worries.<br />
<br />
Now, Let's go with Tadasana with her big strong courageous heart and head back
to the lake.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">-<i>Hop Like a Frog!<br style="mso-special-character: line-break;" />
<br style="mso-special-character: line-break;" />
</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">We have to paddle over the lake! </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">-<i>Boat and Paddle</i></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Past the fireflies!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">-<i>Airplane Both Sides</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;"><br />
And let’s have a giant frog celebration! Join hands and make a tunnel!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">All the graduates of Warrior School run
thought the tunnel!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">(And we all danced, and danced, and danced)….</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">So thank you Leah Cullis for organizing this
wonderful day! Thank you lululemon for supporting this venture!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Thank you LOVE and I WILL for being bigger
than my FEAR and my WHY NOTS. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">And thank you wonderful life, I love you!</span><br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Namaste, </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Catherine Cook-Cottone</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt;">The Yoga Bag</span><br />
<br />
<br />
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-21696519106822652842016-01-11T20:29:00.000-05:002016-01-11T20:29:53.575-05:00Preparing for Your 108 Sun Salutations (1/23/2016) YOGIS IN SERVICE 4th ANNUAL SUNS<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: center; text-autospace: none;">
Preparing for Your 108 Sun Salutations<o:p></o:p></div>
<div style="font-family: HelveticaNeue, 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, 'Lucida Grande', sans-serif; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: center; text-autospace: none;">
Written by Steve Procknal & Catherine Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9mVhQdqu3ZiHa5uztF9Q4Y4hL4C4iYdNffAljFtoDY9rGWoaGugiN29Xph8iHWVVcAusSk1Q4-P2cuQjLE4tDdpjL3PCoozkkWneCA6vqlZR6V1yalCyGxzPMqY2n4Ccbz4EbiTTxKKyy/s1600/Buffalo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="227" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9mVhQdqu3ZiHa5uztF9Q4Y4hL4C4iYdNffAljFtoDY9rGWoaGugiN29Xph8iHWVVcAusSk1Q4-P2cuQjLE4tDdpjL3PCoozkkWneCA6vqlZR6V1yalCyGxzPMqY2n4Ccbz4EbiTTxKKyy/s1600/Buffalo.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="font-size: 13px;">Yogis in Service, 2016<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><u>What to expect:</u></span><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>A room full of happy yogis</li>
<li>Between 2 and 2 and 1/2 hours of Sun Salutations</li>
<li>The suns will start slow, expand to a challenging set of salutations, and then slow down at the end. </li>
<li>A lot of fun. </li>
<li>A raffle</li>
<li>T-shirt sales</li>
<li>Finishing card!</li>
</ul>
<br />
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><u>What to bring:</u></span><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>Water bottle- bring between 20 and 40 ounces of water. You can refill at the 1/2 break</li>
<li>Electrolyte drink</li>
<li>Yoga mat</li>
<li>Hand towel</li>
<li>Mat towel</li>
<li>Cash, credit card, or checks for raffle/t-shirts</li>
<li>Your love of yoga!</li>
</ul>
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><u>To prepare for a 2+hour practice/exercise (e.g., 108 Sun Sals): </u><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Just eat normally leading up to that day, maybe increase your calories a bit but nothing major. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">You do not need to eat some massive carb meal the night before, that will only hurt you the next day because your body will still be breaking that down and trying to eliminate it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Trying to drink excessive water leading up to that day to hydrate won't be additionally beneficial. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Add a bit more fluids each day, a bit more than normal and a bit more calories/carbs and you will be fine. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><u>What to do the day of the Suns:</u></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The day of: I would eat a nice balanced full breakfast, get fats, carbs and protein. Examples. Oatmeal and fruit. Nut butter and toast with a banana. A green smoothie. Eggs, toast and fruit. Something along the lines of that. Keep it on the lighter side. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Start increasing your water a bit early on in the day. Something like 2 water bottles before noon. Have another done before 3pm.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Have a snack late morning. Greek Yogurt, some almonds or brasil nuts or dried fruit, or fruit. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Then, the key is to eat your next meal before 1:30, whatever you normally eat for lunch that works for you. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Have a small snack about an 60-90 min before 4:30 PM. Dates are great. A handful of granola. 1/2 an Avocado with a little bit of salt. Celery is a great natural electrolyte (e.g., maybe celery and a touch of hummus). <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><u>During the Suns: </u></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">During practice make sure you have a water bottle to hold enough water, either choose an electrolyte drink you always use or grab another brand, Vega products are good. Coconut water. Water is fine for at least an hour, your body doesn't really need to get any extra calories until after an hour of strenuous exercise. So even if you brought a Date or two, an energy gel, half a banana and took that half way through you will be fine. Depending on how long you have been doing yoga you may not need anything. Our bodies become efficient when we do the same exercises and we don't need as much. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><u>After the Suns:</u></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Post work out your most important thing is to replenish the carbs you lost, not protein. About 4 Grams carbs to every 1 Gram of protein. Or you can grab whatever makes you feel good. Get some carbs first and then add some protein. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Drink plenty of fluids later and you will be fine. You can add a touch more salt to your food to replenish your salts lost. (I know this sounds serious, I am just giving you the broad facts so you can take what you need for you). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Mostly, HAVE FUN and eat and drink enough. You can always take a break in child's pose and grab a drink at the water fountain. We will be pausing at 1/2 for raffle, drink, and bathrooms. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Can't wait to see you there!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The Sun Salutation Team, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Catherine, Steve, and Candice<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: HelveticaNeue, 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, 'Lucida Grande', sans-serif; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;"></span><br />
<br />Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-14049875238443015162015-11-27T22:30:00.001-05:002015-11-28T18:18:50.863-05:00The Echoing Green: Yoga Practice for the Holidays<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
The Echoing Green:
Yoga Practice for the Holidays<o:p></o:p></div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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I am writing this the day after Thanksgiving, November 27,
2015. There are 28 days until Christmas and 34 days to the New Year. I like
counting and to be sure, the years are adding up. I have noticed that somehow
the passing of the years is not working like math. It isn’t a simple addition--
this year plus the next and the next. Something more than math seems to be
happening. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I have been through almost 50 holiday seasons. Throughout
those years, I have taken many forms- baby, toddler, child, adolescent, and college
student. I have known Christmas day as an angry daughter, forgiving daughter, and
humble daughter. I have held my own daughters’ hands and stroked their hair as
they struggled to sleep on Christmas Eve. I have held my mother’s thin hand and
read her stories during her last Christmas here on Earth. <o:p></o:p></div>
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In all these years of change, there are these echoes. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I am reminded of William Blake’s poem, “The Echoing Green.”
Here is an excerpt. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;">The sun does arise,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;">And make happy the skies.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;">The merry bells ring<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;">To welcome the spring.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;">The skylark and thrush,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;">The birds of the bush,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;">Sing louder around,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;">To the bells’ cheerful sound,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;">While our sports shall be seen<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;">On the echoing green.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Courier; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">William Blake
(1757-1827)<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<a href="http://www.portablepoetry.com/poems/william_blake/the_echoing_green.html">http://www.portablepoetry.com/poems/william_blake/the_echoing_green.html</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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The echoing green takes the form of a holiday canvas upon
which we paint our memories. Each one begins with the penciled sketching of our family, religious, and cultural traditions. There are broad, thick
painted strokes of tree-decorating day, the slow carefully detailed aggregation
of packages under the twinkling branches, and the painful waiting for the paint
to dry and the big day to come. There are sharply scratched-in arguments as family
pressures build negotiating details and tensions arise around silly stuff like shopping.
There are the added accents of parties dappled with laughter and run through
with tears as we embrace the people we haven’t seen and miss people we will
never hold again. In this way, the memories layer like the strokes of a paintbrush
or the notes in a song. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsdme0St9wZjoYj2qtDy9UnQQV0i4Um_dR5NfcEdIB6Hq-fVpWBCFYL8ecimO3waQRbV-FAES6YesK5gfemetRkzXfnYdTDXWtIGM4F8Z2qUZa41i7xaQLrV65d75DzWK14zGAJ2cgCR9l/s1600/CD1906_M.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="229" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsdme0St9wZjoYj2qtDy9UnQQV0i4Um_dR5NfcEdIB6Hq-fVpWBCFYL8ecimO3waQRbV-FAES6YesK5gfemetRkzXfnYdTDXWtIGM4F8Z2qUZa41i7xaQLrV65d75DzWK14zGAJ2cgCR9l/s320/CD1906_M.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Photo from<br />
http://www.cardsdirect.com/product/1310229/musical-christmas-tree.aspx</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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And so it goes, year after year this orchestral arrangement
of the holidays unfolds. I watch the refrain repeat with slowly aging eyes and
a wiser, more softly beating heart. I want to linger over each rich note as the
song seemingly speeds by- sometimes too quick to catch. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Over the years I have found that to fully hear the echoes, I
must be present. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I owe whatever presence I have to my yoga practice. I have
learned how to breathe through unbearable sadness and ground my feet during
overwhelming joy. I have practiced opening my heart when it wants to close and
closing it when it needs to rest. I have learned to balance when the floor seems
unsteady as if only on foot and to use my very core to hold what I know is
good. I can stand as a warrior for what I want for my daughters and my husband.
More, my warrior can take the form of a steady fighter, one with an open heart,
and a warrior for peace. Because of my practice, I can face all that comes my
way and still rest at the end of the day, breath and heartbeat steady. I am
able to truly hear almost any song these holidays bring no matter its depth or
potency. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Right now, late on this day, I welcome the echoing green of
the holidays. It is layered handsomely and oh- so much more than math. If I am
lucky, I will see and hear what these days hold-- the artistry of a grand
painting and the brilliance of a symphony each comprised of the rich texture of
what I know to be true. <o:p></o:p></div>
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My yoga practice has allowed be to hear the lesson of the
echoes as they wisely repeat what matters- love, peace, and connection-
Catherine- that is all you really need. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Namaste, <o:p></o:p></div>
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Catherine Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></div>
Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-58884934353137333962015-11-08T22:11:00.001-05:002015-11-09T08:33:54.765-05:00Effectively Judging “Other” Kinds of Yoga: Five Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Effectively Judging<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Other” Kinds
of Yoga:<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Five Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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You are reading this because, you, like me, think it is
important to make sure everyone knows how to effectively judge, evaluate, and
reject other types of yoga and yoga practitioners. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Why judge? Because being judgmental, on the positive side of
righteousness, and morally superior is very important to your long-term journey
as a yogi. I am pretty sure that is what Patanjali meant when he described
discernment in the Yoga Sutras. Further, “yoga” essentially means “union.” As
the ego is 50% of the ego-and-soul union, it is important that you are sure to
carefully tend and nurture the ego. You see, our culture may not sufficiently
feed the development of the ego. We must do more. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
To help, I have reviewed many posts that judge, evaluate, and exact
moral superiority on “other” kinds of yoga. Then, I distilled what I learned
into the FAQ format (i.e., frequently asked question). Once you read through
this, you can write an effective, judgmental, and morally superior post of your
own. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
First, you are welcome!!!!<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Second, Please write! My only hope is that I can see more
judgmental yoga posts in my news feed on Facebook. It does so much for our
community. So please, please write.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">FAQ #1<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Is my type of yoga
“good” enough to judge others? (or) Is my yoga, the “right” yoga?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast">
Take a deep breath and relax. When you are
judging others, it does not matter what kind of yoga you practice. No matter
the nature of your practice, you can still be morally righteous. When judging
yoga, there is this one rule. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">All kinds of yogis can judge all other kinds
of yoga.</i></b> Do not worry if your yoga is too Western, Eastern, hot, cold,
yin, yang, vinyasa-ish, hatha-ish, restorative, fast, slow, loud, quiet, powerful,
or spiritual. The focus is <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">not on your practice</i></b>. It is on how
other types of yoga are wrong. Remember that. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">FAQ #2<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">What if I don’t
really practice?</b><br />
<br />
Great question. Because the focus
of judging is external, your own practice is irrelevant. Keep your eye on what
others are doing and how you feel about it. Do not worry about your own moral,
physical, relational, or spiritual development. In fact, an internal focus
could get you off track and might weaken your need to judge. Keep your focus
outward.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">FAQ #3<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">What if I don’t’ have
a solid sense of the research or yoga philosophy?</b><br />
<br />
That is okay too. If you look up
the definition of judging, you will see that it is about forming an opinion.
This is good news. In order to judge another kind of yoga, you do not need to educate
yourself about the type of yoga or yoga in general. You simply need to form an
opinion. Once you have formed an opinion, you have all that you need to judge.
In fact, if you educate yourself, you take a risk. Like looking internally or
focusing on your own practice, gaining knowledge of, and familiarity with others
and their yoga experiences may reduce your desire to judge. Accordingly, I
advise against it.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">FAQ #4<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">What if my judgments
and moral superiority are hurtful of others?</b><br />
<br />
It is interesting you ask this. If
you are asking this question you might have lost focus. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Judgment is about “correction”
and not</i></b> <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">connection</i></b>. That is, we do not judge others to feel closer to them,
have empathy, or worry about hurting them. We judge others to help correct
their ways. You see, we have formed an opinion and have judged them. That is
all that matters. If it hurts a little, or even a lot, it is okay- because
correcting them is the most important thing. Connection, relationship, loving-kindness
all get in the way of judgment and moral superiority. Avoid these things.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">FAQ #5<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">What if my judgments
don’t help others change or grow? <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast">
You have so many good questions. However, like
the previous question, this question shows you are off focus. As a morally superior
judge, you should not be too interested in helping others grow. In fact, there
is a substantial body of behavioral research that suggests that harsh judgment of others
does not, in fact, help them grow. Psychologists have discovered many other factors
such as warm supportive relationships, connection, collaboration, and empathy
effectively support behavioral change and growth. Appropriately, judgment is not about
helping others change, it is about having the right opinion. Do not get
confused. It is important to stay on track. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So that is it. Do not worry about your own yoga, your own
practice, your knowledge of yoga in general or of the type of yoga which you
are judging, if you hurt others, or if you are helping others grow. Form an
opinion, focus externally, and judge. It is the RIGHT thing to do. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There is one final note, do not worry about what your
missing when you spend your mental resources, time, and emotions being upset
about what the other yogis are doing. You are only missing chances to grow,
connect with others, learn, and develop your own practice. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Who needs that shit? Not you.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Namaste, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Catherine Cook-Cottone, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Image from http://www.writingwishing.com/2012/10/are-you-judging-me/</td></tr>
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-21605846815456261072015-10-10T16:03:00.004-04:002015-10-10T17:51:50.224-04:00Me to We to Here to Be: Yogis in Service at lululemon<h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>Me to We to Here to Be:</b></div>
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<b>Yogis in Service at lululemon</b></div>
</b></h2>
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[This is
the talk I gave at lululemon conference 10/2015 Vancouver]<o:p></o:p><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQLB7d6BwdpIfLVSlcsaFxi8REFYpA5bIgDtrU-r0tX22XAQHm5STz9govhqQTMjwVU7O78scZCwGtdSCAExkpczV8z3qw0gHDdr7rVOqXBnYP_8Uy4z41ye1vHLyXpzo0XgLZNma6LoLV/s1600/image1.PNG.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQLB7d6BwdpIfLVSlcsaFxi8REFYpA5bIgDtrU-r0tX22XAQHm5STz9govhqQTMjwVU7O78scZCwGtdSCAExkpczV8z3qw0gHDdr7rVOqXBnYP_8Uy4z41ye1vHLyXpzo0XgLZNma6LoLV/s320/image1.PNG.jpeg" width="201" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Catherine Cook-Cottone<br />
10.2015 lululemon Conference</td></tr>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">I am here
to talk about yoga. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
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Yoga: <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<ul>
<li>A set of tools (asana, breath, and meditation) that lets me
be <u>here</u> (<i>hand to heart</i>).</li>
<li>The yoking of mind, body, and soul- the integration of the
self.</li>
<li>A practice that let’s me <u>be</u>- be aware, present, in my
own power, and in my reason for being- my dharma.</li>
<li>A practice of self-love.</li>
</ul>
<o:p></o:p><br />
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGZrvBwhvDmTmO3XowH8Vmnr_B29N_T4dh-zKKaD2UcrCcx20qmgutJQgJaASFfvXTWtrUJtHU_tZQe81azwhlTmsUgSDfIMR1AcBwjBP1hnOQYkeZKRZJVD01cCct-jj3zZkYfH3FQMnz/s1600/image1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGZrvBwhvDmTmO3XowH8Vmnr_B29N_T4dh-zKKaD2UcrCcx20qmgutJQgJaASFfvXTWtrUJtHU_tZQe81azwhlTmsUgSDfIMR1AcBwjBP1hnOQYkeZKRZJVD01cCct-jj3zZkYfH3FQMnz/s320/image1.JPG" width="320" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Catherine Cook-Cottone, age 6</td></tr>
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It took me a long time to find yoga. Always
searching, I wanted to be anywhere else but <u>here</u>. <u>Here</u> was not
for me. I was heading somewhere, achieving, figuring out how to be someone, something
else- getting <u>there</u>. I was concerned with the constant measure of- no my
judgment of- my progress to <u>there</u>. In this stress, I was never enough,
not smart enough, loved enough, or pretty enough. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My body was not enough. Since the day I had a sense
of it- I thought my body was broken, wrong. Not the right shape or size, too
filled with craving. My thinking self fought my body, pushed it to get <u>there</u>-
a battle, no surprise, that ended with an eating disorder. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Ruled from the top-down, disembodied, I did okay. I
got through school, a masters, a Ph.D., and a job as a professor at a
university. Still, I could not rest. You see, I didn’t know that any pursuit of
<u>there</u>, without a safe haven <u>here</u> (<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">hand to heart</i>) was what they call the journey of the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">hungry ghost</i>, an ancient notion of
aberrations roaming the universe never able to be satisfied. <o:p></o:p></div>
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A hungry ghost, I kept going. Resigned to a path
of empty pursuit, I started researching eating disorders- to get <u>there.</u> I
found the works of <span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Dr. Viktor
Frankl, a Professor of Neurology and Psychiatry at the University of Vienna
Medical School. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>During World War II, he
spent years in concentration camps, including Auschwitz and Dachau. In his book
"<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Man's Search for Meaning</i></b>" he makes a keen observation. It
can be summarized like this, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"><b><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Between stimulus and response there is a
space.<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">In this
space lies your <u>power to choose</u>
your response.<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>In your
response lies your growth and your freedom.”</b><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">In
these words, my understanding of the universe was challenged. Where was his <u>there</u>?
In the middle the most horrific conditions with no way out, Frankl found
meaning, <u>here</u> (<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">hand to heart</i>).
It gets better. He called this meaning love, a love that has changed the lives
of millions of people. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">I
wanted to know that space. I wanted the <u>here</u>. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFTCwhG2kyejHcwf9lBo34yIGp_uur4n3Gaw7_b5rnI6IbVFQu7y2Vfeq51jKZ8qPtqDXCDnSz8EdH_ROLFhxy9s3Dbiq7XMwuPOtMHdlps_W07o5BQg_sZ5jQ1PyPeYgd2jh-Fd_ea66R/s1600/FullSizeRender-7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFTCwhG2kyejHcwf9lBo34yIGp_uur4n3Gaw7_b5rnI6IbVFQu7y2Vfeq51jKZ8qPtqDXCDnSz8EdH_ROLFhxy9s3Dbiq7XMwuPOtMHdlps_W07o5BQg_sZ5jQ1PyPeYgd2jh-Fd_ea66R/s320/FullSizeRender-7.jpg" width="308" /></span></a></div>
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<u><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Enter
yoga</span></u><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">. A student at the
university had invited me to her yoga class. I went filled with the notion that
yoga was for people who liked their bodies, who had the good kinds of bodies,
the bodies that looked right, moved right, and easily fell into calm relaxed
states. Yoga was not for people like me. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Curious,
I tried Yoga- anyway. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Asana. Sweat. Breath. Presence. </b>In
yoga, I was <u>here</u> (<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">hand to heart</i>).
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">From <u>here</u></span>,
the process began. Each yoga class, each breath, each embodied moment got me a
bit closer to settling in and connecting with- maybe even liking- then appreciating-
and ultimately loving my own body. You see, I didn’t need to get <u>there</u>
to be okay. Being okay could happen right <u>here</u> (<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">hand to heart</i>). <o:p></o:p></div>
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Yoga practice became my home. In yoga and in that
space Dr. Frankl described so many years ago, I came to trust and love myself.
I could let go of the tight grip on the steering wheel, let the pressure off of
the gas pedal, <u>stay</u>, and breathe. Happiness, empowerment, and freedom
weren’t in the stressful pursuit of <u>there</u>. In the space between stimulus
and response, right <u>here</u>, there is an amazing capacity for love. And
that self-love, like yoga, is not something that is gifted from genetics,
amazing parents, or a neighborhood. It is a practice. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCCRDfkcOoP5Q1FqOBbvNU-ebG8y6v9-VaIXno8g3AdzX3W4b4uYm3kncI_Ynm6GpAkHrg3OThgPwFrwmAyVqPg7LRMwT5Ger4zRC81dNFuEma0_Bwj1DoOHDAPUWqtQaPXnxxbNb9Wrkq/s1600/IMG_3340.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCCRDfkcOoP5Q1FqOBbvNU-ebG8y6v9-VaIXno8g3AdzX3W4b4uYm3kncI_Ynm6GpAkHrg3OThgPwFrwmAyVqPg7LRMwT5Ger4zRC81dNFuEma0_Bwj1DoOHDAPUWqtQaPXnxxbNb9Wrkq/s320/IMG_3340.PNG" width="179" /></span></a></div>
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When you experience the kind of peacefulness and
love I have found, you want to share. I became a yoga teacher. I teach at Power
Yoga Buffalo and yoga is now central in my research. Through the growth I see
in the yogis at our studio, the research findings, and the transformation I
know personally, I am reliably and unfailingly moved by the effectiveness of these
tools.<o:p></o:p></div>
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It doesn’t end there. When you have a resource
this powerful, it becomes an issue of social justice. That is, does everyone
have access? <o:p></o:p></div>
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In Buffalo there is great need. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The 4<sup>th</sup> most impoverish city in the
United States, 26% of Buffalo families live in poverty. The four-year graduation
rate in Buffalo City Schools is 55%. Mortality rates in Erie County are higher
than the NYS average. The main causes of death are cancer, cardio/vascular
disease, homicide, and suicide. <o:p></o:p></div>
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It’s hard to be safe. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
The City of Buffalo is considered one of the most
dangerous in the United States. The crime index in Buffalo City is high at 616,
compared to the US average of 295 and NYC at 246. That means per 100,000, we average
50 and 60 murders, 150-200 rapes, 1,300 robberies, 1,700 assaults, and 4,000 burglaries.
There are thirteen gangs being tracked in the City of Buffalo. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
It’s also hard to be healthy. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
Despite the growing number of urban gardens,
Buffalo is considered a food desert with no grocery stores. Residents are
forced to shop at over-price, junk-laden convenient stores. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
To be certain, there <u>was</u> no yoga. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
Many in the city see no way out of the chronic
stress that fills each day. It’s beyond being scared. Surrounded by obstacles
and lacking resources, there is a sense of resignation for many. It’s a
shutting down of hope. You have a felt sense that things are never going to
change. I know that feeling. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
At the end of a long home practice, sitting on my
mat, mala beads hanging from my hand, I realized- I found <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u>here</u></b> and I can <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u>be</u></b>
of service- a <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><u>Yogi in Service</u></i>.
I have my love of the practice, my skills as a yoga teacher, the university,
the members of the yoga studio in which I teach – I can create access to yoga. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
Yogis in Service teaches yoga on the East-side of
Buffalo. We have our weekly community class on Genesee and Doat and outreaches.
The YIS mission is one of social justice. That is, we believe that all people
regardless of poverty, race, ethnicity, gender, age, and neighborhood should
have access to the tools of yoga. They should have access to that space, the
one between stimulus and response, right <u>here,</u> that is filled with love,
power, and freedom. You don’t need to get it out <u>there</u>. This is a space
that-despite your circumstances- can be found in your practice. In yoga, you build
resilience and strength. You learn how to down regulate your nervous system,
center yourself, and be in intention- <u>a skill set that that has great
consequences in the city</u>. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
Through Yogis in Service, Diane has found Frankl’s
space- her <u>here.</u><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Emotion is no
longer a trigger that ends in more stress and hurt. Yoga has helped her, as it
has helped me, stop, refocus, and breathe before acting, allowing her to act in
full intention. Her grandchildren, Eric and Daija see her, see me, see us, and
embody their practice, learning to think before they act. In that space, in
their <u>here</u>, there are dreams of college and contribution. Emma is more
confident and Cynthia sees her thought patterns, owns them, and has made an
empowering shift from seeing the world through a lens of what she cannot do-
toward a vision of what she can. Recovering from a horrible car accident, Alice
now teaches <u>us</u> poses. Jeannette finds steadiness. Curtis finds calm in
the middle of stress as he works to heal his body from tremendous illness. In Paulette,
we see a journey to self–confidence and peace. She’s <u>here to be</u> happy-
to dig into the <u>here</u> of life and be happy. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
This is the power of yoga, meditation, and sweat- they
are the pathway to <u>here</u>- tools for self-regulation, tools of
integration, and the tools of self-love. It’s amazing what lies in the space
these tools give us. <u>Here</u> we find the very best versions of ourselves,
our passions, and our dharma. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
lululemon Buffalo has supported me on this path
since 2013. They helped my research team raise enough money go to Kenya and study
the Africa Yoga Project, yielding the first published research study of the
work they are doing, and helping me create the framework for Yogis in Service.
With lululemon, I have done workshops, day-long retreats, service classes, and
shared yoga with so many here in Buffalo. Inspired by the presentations I saw
at the Ambassadors Summit in 2013, I successfully pitched YIS to lululemon
Buffalo with a poem. That day, I earned Yogis in Service’s first small metta grant
that allowed us to begin the work of becoming an official not-for-profit. With the <b><u>Here to Be</u></b> grant, we will be building a new yoga studio for our community class, for Yogis in Service. As I close, I will share the poem that got us the first metta grant...<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpFirst">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><b>Y- I- S- Yogis in Service</b><br />
<br />
So many yogis want to serve<br />
Teaching yoga to those in need<br />
Alone it's easy to lose your nerve<br />
Dreams die, un-watered seed<br />
<br />
Yogis need a tribe, a place to go<br />
A collective of the giving<br />
Soil for dream seeds to grow<br />
Evolving thinking into living<br />
<br />
Yogis in Service- I propose<br />
yogis that meet to dream<br />
To drop their fears, to strike the pose<br />
so they can carpe diem<br />
<br />
Goal- equipment to share<br />
Goal- Mats, straps, and blocks<br />
Goal- badass T-shirts to wear<br />
Goal- a web page that rocks<br />
<br />
Goal: yoga in schools, for kids in need<br />
Goal: yoga so everyone can grow<br />
Goal: yoga to inspire hearts to lead<br />
Goal: YIS- across Buffalo<br />
<br />
Yogis in Service, YIS<br />
<br />
Yoga- to unite<br />
<br />
Y- I - do<br />
Y- I- love<br />
Y- I- serve<br />
Y- I- be<br />
<br /><b>
Be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><b>Be the change you want to see in the
world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><b>Yogis in Service, YIS.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><b>Here to be. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Catherine- out.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yogis in Service, 2015</td></tr>
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-12821154441256128582015-09-30T10:18:00.001-04:002015-09-30T19:54:25.954-04:00Social Media and Voice<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b>Social Media and
Voice</b><o:p></o:p></div>
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<b><br /></b></div>
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Catherine Cook-Cottone</div>
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The Yoga Bag</div>
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<br /></div>
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Social media is, among other things, an excellent channel
for OUR voices. Maybe it is my age, but I remember the old days when the media
was controlled by a few very powerful people, news outlets, and corporations. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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I have watched, and studied outcomes, as the media images of
women contributed to problems like eating disorders and objectification of
women. This was done without a counter-voice that could be seen and heard by the masses.
Please note, not all media is bad or creates risk for things like eating
disorders. There are wonderful people and organizations across media. In fact, the effective people in the press in part, preserve our democracy. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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AND the past 20 years have given us social media. Through
social media, the citizenry- the people- have created major shifts in history
using our voices. Lives have been saved. For example, during a horrific earthquake in China, responders were alerted via tweets when cell phone coverage was
taken out due to insufficient capacity. Through social media, we get people to pay attention to things they ignore, oppressed people, and issues that matter. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Social media has a role. I argue-- a powerful role in our
culture. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You can play a role. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In term of eating disorders, objectification, and female development-
I ask that all of my female friends, colleagues, and sisters in gender- PLEASE
POST.<br />
<br />
PLEASE POST all of the amazing things you are doing in your lives. Post about how you are making this world a better place, being healthy, and living in connection and
love. I want to know when you are promoted, published, and when you take a
moment and lovingly SEE your child or friend. I want to know about your challenges
and your victories. Together we can tell the world we- women- are SO MUCH MORE
that our size, shape, and diets (which- by the way- do not work). <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You may not realize it, but your posts are acts of social
activism for young girls and women who- without this version of women in the
media- would be left to the millions of sexualized, objectified images. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When you post- our young girls can see- what is possible for
them. When they see women being in power in their lives- they think, “That could
be me.” When they see older women defying age and gender bias- using their
voices (through writing books, in acts of social justice, or via acts of love)
they have hope. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yes- when you post- our young girls and adolescents can see
more than airbrushed, sexualized images. They can see more than reality shows
based solely and completely on appearance and social capital. They can see more
than women focusing their entire cognitive and physical capacity on trying to
be smaller- not for health reasons- but to conform to unrealistic, unhealthy
body standards. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
PLEASE POST<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Post so they can see. Post so I can see and honor your
efforts. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
PLEASE POST so the WORLD can see that being a WOMAN is about
being up to powerful, wonderful, and beautiful things. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And for those of you who are already posting- thank you!<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Catherine<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-50167712089238539442015-08-22T18:34:00.001-04:002015-08-23T12:37:31.338-04:00The Centripetal Force of Yoga in my Life<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
The Centripetal Force
of Yoga in my Life<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Catherine
Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p></div>
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The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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I have had a big year. Life has been like a giant <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">roundabout</i>, one of those merry-go-rounds
they used have in playgrounds. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmAUngoCk9h6SDKFl6V7xuwrH4zlkVRQtA99C9XQl964lXHfjL277URWnbGSFg2T4AnTTDpNlkuHXohltI1ChDBL2avJBD1RsQjKKSbYVOrLBOMXm4BFEtHuccJNagTkjkm1e7BDsc7Bf6/s1600/Spinner.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmAUngoCk9h6SDKFl6V7xuwrH4zlkVRQtA99C9XQl964lXHfjL277URWnbGSFg2T4AnTTDpNlkuHXohltI1ChDBL2avJBD1RsQjKKSbYVOrLBOMXm4BFEtHuccJNagTkjkm1e7BDsc7Bf6/s320/Spinner.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small; text-align: start;">from http://www.noise-to-signal.com/2006/11/again_with_the_.html</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When I was little, we’d run to the roundabout. It was like a
race to see who could get to it first. I’d often wait, with one or two others,
as the rest of the kids bounded on. The runners, we’d grab one of the metal
bars committed to getting it spinning. Walking first, I would move into a run,
digging my feet into the dry clay below, breath fast, heart beating. When the
roundabout got going faster than I could run, I would grasp the bar with both
hands, pushing from my feet I would jump on the roundabout to join the others. Whirling.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Two forces took hold. The first, centrifugal. It whipped us mercilessly
to the outside edge. If we were going fast enough, one or two of us kids would
fly off- sometimes landing on their feet, sometimes rolling across the clay
causing us to stop and see if they were okay. If they weren’t, we took them to
their moms. I think this is why, at some point, they decided roundabouts were
too dangerous. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When we were spinning, I became the second force. The centripetal
force. This is the force that pulls you back to center. I would shuffle my feet
to the middle of the roundabout, the world spiraling around me. As I saw others
slipping away, I would grab hands, arms, or bodies and pull them back to safety.
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I would pull them back to center. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yes. Life, this year, has been a giant roundabout. So many
good and horrible things have been the force behind the feet running, digging
into the clay, and getting the roundabout spinning. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I have had the honor of presenting on a panel a Kripalu as a
yoga researcher. I gave the commencement speech at Amherst Central High School,
an honest-to-God, bucket-list dream. I spoke at the American Psychological Association
on a positive body image panel with women I have admired from afar for years. I
taught yoga on the lawn of the White House at the White House Easter Egg Roll
with yogis I have only read about in magazines. Bucket-list? Yes. I could
barely breathe all day. I turned 50 and started a not-for-profit, Yogis in
Service (YIS; <a href="http://yogisinservice.org/">http://yogisinservice.org</a>)
and was granted $15,000 from lululemon to build a yoga studio for YIS. Yep.
More bucket-list dreams. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And my mom died. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Suddenly, I realized that for longer than I could stand, I
had been on that roundabout barely holding myself together. I felt like the kid
whose feet fell off and were dragging, shins scraping, outer thigh hitting the
metal rim. I was the kid who was afraid to let go, knowing that if she does, she will
hit the hard clay earth and tumble, maybe break. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I could only hold on as tight as I could. I could not feel.
I could not cry. I was afraid my tears would loosen my grip. They would be
party to my fall. Where was that girl? The one who shuffles herself to the
middle and pulls those who are falling back to center. Where was she when I
needed her most? <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I found her on my yoga mat. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Through all of the centrifugal life forces, the good, the
bad, and the horrifically devastating, the “I” that has grown out of years of
yoga practice saw me struggling. I didn’t know she, my yoga, saw me. But she
did. On my yoga mat, we caught eyes and at that moment, at that very moment,
for the first time- in a long time- I believed that I might be okay. I believed
that I might be able to loosen my grip and not get hurt. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As she held my eyes, yoga
reached out her steady, centered hand. Our fingers touched. She reached more. I
couldn’t. The other forces were pulling too hard. Our hands interlocked. I reached out my other hand and we grasped
hands to forearms. I was going to be okay. My yoga, she pulled me to the center,
a massive centripetal force, and held me. I exhaled. My shoulders softened. I
cried. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Somewhere in a deeply grounded warrior one, I felt the roundabout
slow. I moved into warrior three, my hands at my heart, in prayer. I held
there, curiously noticing that I could stand on my one, earthy foot and feel
strong. Slowly, I moved into warrior one, hands still at prayer.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I was in our back room. It is a beautiful room my husband
built from the form of an old Florida room. It is square, lovingly detailed
with intricately carved wood edging around the ceiling and a handcrafted fireplace.
I had closed the French doors so the fire could create a heat to soften my
practice. The air was warm and still in this room. In my warrior one, eyes
closed, hands at my heart, I felt something. I can only describe it like a
gentle breeze moving through and by me. Startled, I opened my eyes and looked
around. Nothing. Nothing? Mom. <o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEih9owDIFHXueXMOHJ4GzhFidkibs5GfpbGC5jE2CShOjPRLQvOvbJWYm1YY0-Sqiq7dtRyTkNOzhB7s7KrUD_PrI2EqBH8iTjZ3Y4eUWFxhKDGF8LxTZPsMTEm_V5woKOjtHFj-97MrG7l/s1600/FullSizeRender-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEih9owDIFHXueXMOHJ4GzhFidkibs5GfpbGC5jE2CShOjPRLQvOvbJWYm1YY0-Sqiq7dtRyTkNOzhB7s7KrUD_PrI2EqBH8iTjZ3Y4eUWFxhKDGF8LxTZPsMTEm_V5woKOjtHFj-97MrG7l/s200/FullSizeRender-2.jpg" width="193" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Back Room, 2015</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yoga, you pulled me to center and stopped the roundabout.
Then, you took me to my mom. You knew that sometimes, us kids, we need exactly
that. You are my centripetal force. The gift that pulls me back to center.
Before I even knew you, you were in me, embodied by the little me that made
sure no one fell of the ride. Not on our watch, right yoga? Thank you for
always being there. Because Lord knows, I need you. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Namaste, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Catherine Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></div>
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-10214236265251214422015-07-13T11:09:00.003-04:002015-08-26T18:59:03.017-04:00The birth story of Yogis in Service (YIS): Light shines because we have all carried the torch<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: center; text-autospace: none;">
<b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">The birth story of Yogis in
Service (YIS):</span></b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Light shines because we have all
carried the torch</span></b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">I don't know if you know the whole story- but the
sparks for Yogis In Service (YIS) began through the kindling of spirits and
because of the warmth of hearts. The first spark was lit at the meeting of two
powerful individuals, community builders, and bright minds. In early 2013, Gary
Steeves, Pastor at the Lutheran Resurrection Church (on the intersection of
Genesee and Doat Streets on the East-side of Buffalo) connected with Susan
Fain, co-owner of Power Yoga Buffalo. When they started talking and creating,
the torch was lit. Moments like these are what are known as the <b><i>sparks
of creation</i></b>. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">The spark became the flame on the torch, as words
became actions. The earliest efforts involved working to train teachers from
the East-side so that they could teach yoga in their own community. There were
many obstacles from transportation to working out the best times to meet. I
have learned that with anything new and great there are always obstacles. These
barriers did not extinguish the fire. No. It meant that other ways had to be
found. Susan and Gary persisted and it was decided that offering yoga for the
kids at the summer camp would be a good way to create access to yoga on the
East-side. The torch remained.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Alexis Asquith, a Power Yoga Buffalo teacher, dove
in feet first and volunteered to help with day camp for the entire 6 weeks, for
the entire day camp schedule. Alexis became the passionate holder of the torch.
She was the central teacher for the yoga at day camp. A schedule was created
and yoga teachers taught the 40 day campers yoga two times a week for 6 weeks.
Susan Fain, myself, as well as others including students from
the University of Buffalo, in the Counseling, School and Educational Psychology
Program as well as students from the School of Social Work helped and the torch
burned brightly lighting up the hearts of the day campers and opening eyes to
the stress reducing, physical health promoting effects of yoga.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">It so happened that this was this same summer
(2013) that a group of yogis from Power Yoga Buffalo were going to Kenya to
study the effects of the Africa Yoga Project. I led the research team that
included students from my research team at UB (Jessalyn Klein and Carla
Giambrone), a psychiatrist and yogi (Dr. Nan Herron), a psychologist and yogi (Dr. Jerry Cottone) and Power Yoga Buffalo teachers (Susan Fain, Steven
Procknal, and Brooke Easton). The trip was amazing! What this team saw and
learned was further inspiration to make a difference here in Buffalo.
While we were in Africa, Alexis and the other volunteers were tending the torch
in Buffalo.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">When the research team got back from Africa (July
2013) Susan Fain created the Saturday Community Class framework at the
Resurrection Church Community Center modeled after what we learned in Africa.
Saturday mornings at 10:00 AM a team of teachers provided a free community yoga
class followed by a community meal. Susan Fain, Cole Baily, Alexis Asquith, and
Casey Sotland (and a lot of other PYB yogis volunteering and assisting) led
classes and provided meals through April 2014. They also created an amazing
holiday season with gifts and food for the growing class of East-side Yogis.
The torch was held high and burning brightly!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">In April of 2014, Power Yoga Buffalo added an
additional studio in Elmwood Village signaling that it was time to pass the
torch. Once the PYB Elmwood studio opened, a small group of UB Occupational
Therapy (OT) students who were taking the Yoga for Health and Healing course
and a Service Course through their UB, OT program carried the torch until
Summer. The Yoga for Health and Healing course is part of a larger certificate in Mindful Counseling for
Wellness and Engagement offered at UB (see <a href="http://gse.buffalo.edu/cert-completion/counseling"><span style="color: #420178;">http://gse.buffalo.edu/cert-completion/counseling</span></a>).
These were the very first students to bring service learning directly to yoga
on the East Side. Dr. Mary Matteliano (clinical professor at UB and a PYB yogi)
supervised these students (see her page here- <a href="https://sphhp.buffalo.edu/rehabilitation-science/faculty-and-staff/faculty-directory/mmatte.html"><span style="color: #420178;">https://sphhp.buffalo.edu/rehabilitation-science/faculty-and-staff/faculty-directory/mmatte.html</span></a>).
Dr. Matteliano and the OT students now carried the torch. Graduation day came.
It was time for the OT students to hand off the torch. (Note, Dr. Matteliano
still supervises OT students as they support YIS to date!). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">This is the VERY COOL part of the story. You see,
just when there was a very big chance the torch would go dark, a small group of
East-side yogis picked up the torch. Inspired by all the work PYB (Susan,
Casey, Cole, Alexis, and others) and the students from UB had done as well as
Facebook support from Alexis Asquith (she had moved to
California), Diane Rose and a small group of East-side yogis like Eric and
Daija, kept going and practicing yoga every Saturday. I have seen the sign-in book.
They kept it up. The torch was held.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><br /></span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaYpW296gR2VROMj-qV3g6KPzYI3D3xQ4XQ5b3A8fOr8ysAWatm2dP5URWDpr0bkH5fIxtacvCCd3wp1mxiC9nddQie4_NrhuweAcbQIhV20P016wspnbwvOaVnEti98Y4Y9v5B-u2qZZD/s1600/bbc-olympic-torch-relay.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="223" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaYpW296gR2VROMj-qV3g6KPzYI3D3xQ4XQ5b3A8fOr8ysAWatm2dP5URWDpr0bkH5fIxtacvCCd3wp1mxiC9nddQie4_NrhuweAcbQIhV20P016wspnbwvOaVnEti98Y4Y9v5B-u2qZZD/s400/bbc-olympic-torch-relay.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">From http://theinspirationroom.com/daily/2012/bbc-olympic-torch-relay/</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">This winter (2014-2015), when I dropped by the
church to see if Yogis in Service was possible- Gary Steeves (pastor) showed me
the yoga sign-in book. Despite my fears, the torch had never dimmed. There it
was- as evidenced by the weeks and weeks of sign-in pages- the torch
was still burning and ready to grow.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><i><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">It was at that moment that I knew creating YIS was
the right thing to do.</span></i></b><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">I am writing this because I think sometimes we
wonder if we make a difference. You wonder if the time that <i><u>you</u></i>
carried the torch, the times when <i><u>you</u></i> showed up in the snow of
December or the deep chill of January, the days <i><u>you</u></i> were there
and no one else was, the Facebook messages of support, the reaching out, the
kind words, the knowing in <i><u>your</u></i> heart- all of that- <i><u>you,
me, we all</u></i> wonder if our efforts matter- I think- truth be told- we
wonder if we matter.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Well- we do! <i><u>You do!</u></i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Today, the torch burns brighter than ever!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">This torch is now held help up by Yogis from all
over Buffalo, across studios, from programs at the UB, and professionals like
the amazing lawyers at <a href="https://www.linkedin.com/company/purrington-moody-weil"><span style="color: #420178;">https://www.linkedin.com/company/purrington-moody-weil</span></a>
who helped us get our 501c3- specifically- Dominka Tanianis, Esq. and Mark
Fanton, Esq., like the powerful list of supporters- like Richard Amiko, Steve and Kathleen Boyd, Hope Commerford, Jamie Pearsen, Danny and Nancy Irwin, Sheri Curry, Lindsay Travers, Melissa Abrams, Marissa Bland, Sarah Panzica, Susan Fain, Hannah Duke, Marta Schoenle, Molly Muffoletto, Gary Steeves, Ingram Micro, and lululemon Waldern-Galleria- see more here <a href="http://yogisinservice.org/support-yis/yis-supporters/"><span style="color: #420178;">http://yogisinservice.org/support-yis/yis-supporters/</span></a>
and the wonderful YIS board of directors Lindsay Kirsch (also amazing web and t-shirt designer), Steve Procknal, Wendy Guyker (Treasurer), Allison Flammer, Mary Carney, and Jerry Cottone- see more here <a href="http://yogisinservice.org/about-yis/board-of-directors/"><span style="color: #420178;">http://yogisinservice.org/about-yis/board-of-directors/</span></a>
, and our creative teachers here- <a href="http://yogisinservice.org/about-yis/yis-teachers/"><span style="color: #420178;">http://yogisinservice.org/about-yis/yis-teachers/</span></a>
and more- like Diane Rose, Eric H. and Daija. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">The Saturday Community Class continues at 10:00-
11:15 AM every Saturday followed by a healthy snack. We are teaching yoga at
summer camp just like the early years. We have outreaches in the spring and
fall for East-side kids in after school- see <a href="http://yogisinservice.org/projects/"><span style="color: #420178;">http://yogisinservice.org/projects/</span></a>
for a description of our projects.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">For perhaps the best view- see our video on our
home page <a href="http://yogisinservice.org/"><span style="color: #420178;">http://yogisinservice.org</span></a>
(Thanks Lindsay Travers for video development). You will see exactly what
I am talking about!<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">We shine because you shine. YIS is here because of all of those who showed up and kept showing up. YIS is here because of all of the torch bearers past and present. YIS is so very, very grateful. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">So help us carry the YIS torch or find the fire
that lights up your heart. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Importantly, know that what <b><i>you do</i></b>
makes a difference. You matter. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Namaste,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Catherine Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-65275401826058779782015-06-28T15:30:00.000-04:002015-06-29T07:17:44.253-04:00Find Out More about Yogis in Service (YIS)<div class="p1" style="border: 0px; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 24px; margin-bottom: 1.625em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span class="s1" style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Find Out More about Yogis in Service (YIS)</span></div>
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Yogis in Service began with a wish: A wish that everyone—all shapes, sizes, skin tones, and in all neighborhoods—could have access to yoga. With a deep inhale and an exhale, we headed out to make our wish come true—for us, for you, and for Buffalo.</div>
<div class="p1" style="border: 0px; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 24px; margin-bottom: 1.625em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span class="s1" style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Yogis in Service is a community group that supports yogis who are bringing yoga to their communities. At Yogis in Service we pride ourselves in the daily contribution to individual and community wellbeing. We believe that by sharing yoga we can increase the health and opportunity of each individual in the community.</span></div>
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Yogis in Service meet one Sunday a month to listen, problem solve. dream, and create community empowering goals. The rest of the time, we are out in our communities- schools, hospitals, universities, churches, and treatment centers- teaching and assisting yoga.</div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/-%20See%20more%20at:%20http://yogisinservice.org/about-yis/#sthash.np4zxbcj.dpuf">- See more at: http://yogisinservice.org/about-yis/#sthash.np4zxbcj.dpuf</a><br />
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We are raising money for our new yoga studio on Genessee and Doat in the Resurrection Village Community Center our Goal is $5,000<br />
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Click here to donate:<br />
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<a href="http://yogisinservice.org/donate-now/">Go to Donate to YIS now</a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyMl1xKAY8Y-EGYdV3Qxb15D1DaLAG5CE-h1nA47GCOgCbsGYq2ih8JDaigccEp9XjeeBCzllqf-hhnBVFiWw_XG4MBRYV26Jb1O5Q63yAciCEKAWaji3Gt4m1dXtzMktF-YliyZ643gKq/s1600/YIS.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="227" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyMl1xKAY8Y-EGYdV3Qxb15D1DaLAG5CE-h1nA47GCOgCbsGYq2ih8JDaigccEp9XjeeBCzllqf-hhnBVFiWw_XG4MBRYV26Jb1O5Q63yAciCEKAWaji3Gt4m1dXtzMktF-YliyZ643gKq/s320/YIS.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<br />Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-83390124711138674652015-06-27T16:33:00.001-04:002015-06-27T18:29:14.248-04:00The Space between Stimulus and Response: Finding Your True Self-- Amherst High School Commencement, 2015 Catherine Cook-Cottone<div align="center" class="MsoNormalCxSpFirst" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">The Space between Stimulus and Response:<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Finding Your True Self<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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Amherst
High School Commencement, 2015<o:p></o:p></div>
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Catherine
Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p></div>
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Graduating Class of 2015, <o:p></o:p></div>
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I have a question for you. This question comes from
the Pulitzer prize winning poet Mary Oliver. She asks, “<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Tell me, what IS IT you plan to
do with this one wild and precious life?</i></b>” <o:p></o:p></div>
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If your attention span is anything like mine was
the day I graduated, I will say that for you again- “<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Tell me, what IS IT you plan to
do with this one wild and precious life?</i></b>” <o:p></o:p></div>
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How does that question land? For some of you, the
answer is easy. You know. You answer quickly that you are going to college and
where. Others are less sure. Travel, work, a gap year? Well, it might put many
of you at ease to know- <u>that</u>- is not what I am asking about. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I am asking you about something closer, something
in the here and now. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am asking you
about a space. A space worthy of your seeking. A space in which you- each of
you- can find your true selves. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I continue with another quote. This quote comes
from Viktor Frankl.<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"> Dr. Frankl was a
Professor of Neurology and Psychiatry at the University of Vienna Medical
School. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>During World War II, he spent
years in concentration camps, including Auschwitz and Dachau. As a Jewish prisoner
of war and medical doctor, he treated other prisoners who had deadly illnesses
such as typhoid. He tried to help as best he could. Still, he watched as many
of his patients were among the millions that died at the hands of the Nazis.
Dr. Frankl lost his wife and much of his family. We would all have understood
his choices if he had surrendered into complete dejection and hate. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Imagine
yourself in his shoes for just a moment- a witness to the worst in human
behavior, to tragic and horrific loss of life, the loss of beloved family- what
would you do? Yeah- I don’t know either. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">I can tell
you what Dr. Frankl did. Instead of giving in to all that at happened <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><u>to</u></i></b>
him, following liberation, Dr. Frankl authored 39 books. His most famous book
"<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Man's Search for Meaning</i></b>" has been deemed by the Library
of Congress as one of "the ten most influential books in America." In
this book, he makes a keen observation. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">It can be
summarized like this, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">“Between stimulus and
response there is a space.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">In this space lies your <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u>power to choose</u></b> your response.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">In your response lies your
growth and your freedom.”<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">You see,
who you are, your true character lies in this space.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The question I asked you just moments ago….. </span>“<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Tell
me, what is it you plan to do with this one wild and precious life?</i></b>” It
can be answered in these spaces. Truth be told, the best-laid plans can change
dramatically, in a moment. It is in your interest to <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><u>own</u></i> this fascinating, life changing SPACE between stimulus
and response. <span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Class of
2015, you live in historic times. There is no doubt about that. It remains
true- just as it was for Dr. Frankl- that who you are, what you choose, what
you create is not solely defined by the stimulus- things like your trauma, good
looks or lack thereof, family, wealth, poverty, or legacy. Further, it is not
defined by reactions, consequences, or rewards- deserved and undeserved-
wonderful and horrible. No matter what occurs before and what happens after, who
you are- lies in each of your choices. Nowhere else. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">You MIGHT
even consider that when life throws a challenge your way, a chance to choose,
that life is not happening <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><u>to you</u></i>,
it is happening <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><u>for you</u></i>. Yeah-
it happens for you-- for you to find out who you are. This </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">one
wild and precious life </i></b>you see- <span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">It
gives you a chance to seek out and dig into these spaces. Your </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">one
wild and precious life</i></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"> gives
you the chance to choose. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Often, we
don’t see these opportunities coming. We fail to see the gravity of the moments
in which <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">choices</i></b> are presenting themselves to us. Looking back we see-
with 20/20 vision what could have been- might have been- if only we had chosen
differently. Ahhhh but If we are lucky- we see these moments- these choices- as
they present themselves to us. So, today my gift to you is to give you a
heads-up. So here we go, a review of<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><u> eight</u></i>
of the many choices that live in that beautiful, amazing space between stimulus
and response.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Choice #1: Be on purpose<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">When I was
little, there was this thing that made anything you did shift from a mild
indiscretion to a serious offense- So there is, “Mom! She just hit me! She hit me
right in the face!” Okay, that is pretty bad. Maybe that reflects even more
than a mild indiscretion. However, if it was reported like this, “Mom! She just
hit me. She hit me right in the face!…. (and here is the critical part)… “ON
PURPOSE.” <Gasp> Now that is serious.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>When you are a kid, it really matters if you do something <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">on
purpose</i></b>. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Guess
what, you are all old enough to graduate from high school and it still matters.
Being on purpose, means that you live and act with <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">intention</i></b>. Here is how
you do it. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>First, breathe- unless it is
an absolute emergency- (which very few moments really are)- <u>wait</u>- ground
your feet, take a another deep breath and be ON PURPOSE. Yeah- do what you are
up to- on purpose. Not by accident, not in a hurry, not mindlessly, not because
you were drunk, and not by the seat-of-your-pants. NO! Dig your feet into the
earth below you, breathe, and be on purpose. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Choice #2: Consider kindness and
compassion</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">When</span></i></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"> you are triggered. Notice, I did not say <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“if”</i></b>
you are triggered. I said <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“when”</i></b> you are triggered, with your
ON PURPOSE consider filling the space between stimulus and response with kindness
and compassion. This is risky yes- but trust that if being kind and
compassionate doesn’t work, you can always be a jerk later (pause). Kindness
and compassion might show up as giving the other person the benefit of the
doubt. Perhaps you consider that each of us is fighting our own battle, that we
are doing the best we can, and sometimes, you- me- we all- fall short. And when
we do, we need kindness and compassion. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">I also ask
you to consider being kind to yourself. Us parents have spent years trying to
help you kids have a good self-esteem. As it turns out, researchers have
discovered that self-esteem is nice, but it is difficult to maintain and not
all that helpful. First, to get self-esteem you need to succeed, win the game,
be the best, or the prettiest, funniest, and most popular. “Perfect,” you say, “that
is a plan! I just need to win and I will have high self-esteem and that is
good. I am good.” Okay class of 2015, look to your left and to your right.
Those are your competitors- stare them down. If they win, you lose. (Pause). So,
this begs the question, <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“How can<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> <u>we
all</u></i></b> win?” We can’t and won’t. When one of us wins, a lot of us- simply
as collateral damage- lose. So what now? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To fix this, we started giving everyone
trophy’s. The parents say, “Wow, you got a trophy. Look at that!” The kid shrugs
and says, “So- everyone got one.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">The good
news is the research tells us that having self-compassion is more helpful than
self-esteem and you don’t need to crush your friends to get there. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Self-compassion correlates with less anxiety,
better academic performance, and higher achievement of goals- and many more
really great things. Self-compassion involves being kind to yourself no matter
what. It means honoring your struggle, hard work, and effort. It means knowing
that we all try and we all fail and it is part of the common human experience.
It is being able to look clearly at what you could have done better and giving
yourself the talk, “Look Catherine, you tried. Today was a hard day. We all have
days like this. So, you were a little nervous, maybe a little sweaty. It’s hot
up on stage. You wore that robe and the hat. Let it go. Your next speech, well
that speech will be fabulous!” Self-compassion looks like that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, choose kindness and compassion it will
serve you as well as those around you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Choice #3: Do the right thing, not the
easy thing<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">When we
are lucky, the right thing is the easy thing- and reality is, the more times
you choose the right thing- the easier it gets. In 2013, I took a team to Kenya
to research the Africa Yoga Project, a program employing almost 100 Kenyans as
yoga teachers offering yoga to nearly 5,000 Kenyans a week. We conducted some
of the research in the Kibera slums. </span><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">About 1 million people live in Kibera, which is the size of New York
City’s Central Park. Kibera is jammed with row after row of tin huts, each
housing up to eight people. There is no plumbing or running water. There are no
streets, lighting, police, or medical facilities.<span style="mso-font-kerning: .5pt;"> </span>Urine and feces run in the ruts of the walking paths. Life
expectancy in Kibera is 30 years of age and one out of five children do not live
to see age 5. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">When my
research team returned from completing Phase 1 of our study in Kibera, a few team
members approached me and said they did not feel safe enough to go back. We had
hired security, but the truth was, I could not ensure everyone’s safety. I was
in one of these spaces. On one hand, I wanted the study to be successful and-
on the other hand- I wanted my team to feel safe. I was tired and frustrated. I
took a deep breath, waited, grounded my feet, and with my ON PURPOSE-- I
approached the team. I told them that the choice was theirs to make. Sure, I
wanted the help. Yeah, it was critical for us to find out more about the
effects of yoga in the Kibera slums. And No, my desire to collect these data
were not more important than the security and well-being of <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u>any one member</u></b> of my team. The
next day, a smaller group of us went to Kibera and completed Phase 2. I have a
photo of my husband working with a child on the clay floor of the Kibera school,
no roof or books, and a chicken running by. We had a truly inspiring day. And
the team members that stayed back, they happily prepared our materials for the
next few days. They were uplifted by their power to choose. The easy thing
would have been to express my frustration and argue with the team. The right
thing was to allow choice even if it meant I might lose data. I did the right
thing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Choice #4: Choose love over fear<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">This is a
big one. In his book, “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Man’s Search for
Meaning</i>,” Viktor Frankl described a forced march, prisoners starving and
freezing, holding each other up. He had <u>this</u> realization, he said, “…for
the first time in my life I saw the truth as it is set into song by so many
poets, proclaimed as the final wisdom by so many thinkers. The truth— that love
is the ultimate and highest goal to which man can aspire.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">I have my
own, smaller story. I had moved around a lot as a kid. When I was about the age
you are right now- class of 2015. I told myself that I would not get attached
to anyone, ever again- because it hurt too much to say goodbye. Well, that was
a bad plan- the world is too full of amazing people to not fall in love. And against
my best-laid plans, I met my husband and then worse, I had two daughters. It
all came down to this moment, one of the most difficult moments of my life. It
was an early Saturday morning. My husband had gone for a run and my daughters
had climbed up into our bed to cuddle. I was snuggling with them and all of a
sudden- I was overwhelmed by how much I loved them. I started thinking about
what it would feel like if something happened to them. I was terrified. I had
an overwhelming urge to run miles away from the fear I was feeling. Instead, I
said, “Catherine- stay. Stay here and feel what you feel.” And at that moment,
I chose love over fear. My girls did not understand why tears were streaming
down my face. They were tears of joy- because I let myself choose love. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">You will
have these moments because one of the scariest things you will ever do-- is to
love. I promise. You will have instants when the words, “I love you” will lift
a parent’s heart, bring joy to a grandparent, light up a child’s face, and mean
more than you can imagine to a dear friend. Don’t be afraid to say, “ I love
you.” I chose love over fear and I hope you do too. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Choice #5: Choose joy<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">During our
second trip to Kibera, we saw devastating hardship and we saw something else.
We saw children playing, laughing, and running into the arms of their mothers.
We saw smiles and dancing. We saw, in the midst of devastating hardship and poverty,
what could only be described as joy. When we got back to our room that night,
my husband and I talked about all we had in our lives, a house, fresh food and
water, and healthy children. Yet, despite all that we had- it was so easy for
us to get caught up in what we didn’t have. We sat in silence. Then, Jerry
said, “I know what we learned today. We learned that you choose joy. It is not
about what you have or don’t have, at a certain point- you- just- choose- joy.”
He was right. We choose joy. Choose to step into the dance, the laughter, the
love, the do-it-anyways of life. In your spaces, choose joy. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Choice #6: <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Choose meaning <o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">And in
this choice lies the critical question, “What is your purpose?” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some believe that were all born with a purpose-
a dharma- a reason for being. So, start today and live the question, “What is
my purpose?” When you consider your answer, dare to dream. You’ll know you have
found the right answer because it will feel right in your gut and your heart
and it will make sense up here. Other things will happen too. You will get excited
to go to work. You will laugh with your colleagues during the hardest of days.
You will cry because you can’t make a difference fast enough. You will see
setbacks as part of the mission. And you will get up everyday, ready to carve
out the next steps. Then there is this one- this one is really important Class
of 2015- you will look to your left and to your right and see your <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><u>comrades</u></i>, not your competitors.
You see, when you find your reason for being, you will change this world in ways
that bring you <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><u>closer</u></i> to
others not <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><u>further away</u></i>-
because that is what <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">reasons-for-being</i></b> are all about.
They are about the WE and not the I. Choose meaning. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Choice #7:
Get out of your comfort zone<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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It is said that, “Life begins at the edge of your
comfort zone.” We all have our comfort zones. For some of you, it’s on the
couch binge watching your favorite show. For others, it’s the same old friends,
your routines, and the things you know you’ll get right. It’s the place where
we feel safe, yes. However, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">magic happens outside of your comfort zone</i></b>.
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Right now, ask yourself, “What would
I do with my life if I wasn’t afraid to fail?” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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I am living it now. With a not-for-profit I founded,
Yogis in Service, I have committed to building a yoga studio on the East-side
of Buffalo. Why? because I believe in social justice. I believe that all of us
should have access the safe places to exercise, learn to breathe, and cope with
stress. I was there this morning teaching yoga. In fact, that is my reason-for-being-
to give others access to the tools of self-regulation. To build this studio, we
need to construct a wall and put in both a subfloor and yoga floor. We don’t
have the money or supplies….. yet. In fact, I am not exactly sure how we are
going to pull this off. And as I share my goals with the world, I am nervous,
really nervous. Some days I am down right scared. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just like I was when I applied to my master’s and
doctoral programs, when I defended my dissertation, when I fell in love with my
husband and had my daughters, when we bought our house, when I started putting
together the team to go to Africa, and now standing in front of you giving my
first ever commencement speech. This, my friends, is outside of my comfort zone
and this is where the magic happens. Come join me in the space outside of your
comfort zone. <span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Choice #8: Consider that you are worth the
effort<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">This is
the last one, and perhaps the most important. I am going to tell you something not
too many people know, I failed/dropped out of college. Yes. I did. I was going
through what some people call a “rough patch” that involved a break-up and a
lot of bad choices. Truth is, I went through a period of time when I was hurting
and I did not believe that my self, this self, or my dreams were worth the
effort. Hurt and loss can be confusing that way. The good news is that during
this time, there was a small voice inside that kept reminding me that I had
something valuable to offer. That even though I had messed up, there was more
to me than my mistakes. I can tell you right now, as someone who has pulled
herself up by her bootstraps, that it is never too late to turn it around and
there is no dream too big for me, you, or anyone. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Digging
into the place between stimulus and response in not easy. It can be a pretty
intimidating notion to really get it-- that life happens <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">for you</i></b> and <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">not
to </i></b>you. Yeah, it requires effort, looking your worst choices right in
the eyes, and moving forward anyway. There will be times when you will fail,
you will be hurting, and you will feel like giving up and it- is- at- exactly- these
moments that you will need to remember that YOU are worth the effort. Choose
you and when you choose you, you will be choosing all of us too. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You see, I believe that we are all
inextricably interconnected and if anyone of us gives up on his or herself- on
his or her reason for being- well, we all lose. So for you, for me, for us- please
know that you are worth the effort. Choose you. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">There are
many more of these choices that you will face during your <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">one wild and precious life</i></b>.
As you have other things to do today-- beyond listening to this speech-- I
cannot list them all. And trust me, I would love to. There are really good
ones, like-- value the journey as much as the destination, look for the big
picture in the tiniest of moments, find humor, never forget your friends, be
humble, see beauty in the quirks, send thank you cards, and as the words to one
of my mom’s favorite songs plead, “When you get the choice to sit it out or
dance, I hope you dance.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Ultimately,
I am asking you to be a seeker. Look for the choices that live in your spaces-
those beautiful spaces between stimulus and response- where you will come
face-to-face with your true self, eyes wide open, and heart ready. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
Class of 2015, “<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Tell me, what is it you plan to
do with this one wild and precious life?</i></b>” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">In
my day, this would the time to say, “May the force be with you.” But that was
32 years ago. I could also say- “May the odds be ever in your favor” but that
is too 2014. So one last gift to you class of 2015—I give you your own tag
line- <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Choose well-- my friends-- choose well. </span></b><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Thank
you! And Congratulations!</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-24621710588026667172015-05-23T21:17:00.001-04:002015-05-23T22:56:37.565-04:00When your Mom Dies<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">When your Mom Dies<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Catherine
Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
He said, “One, two,
four, six months…”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Okay six, six months.
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Six weeks. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Let’s move the bed
downstairs. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
This looks nice. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
In the living room,
by the bed, a movie with Mom and Dad<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Mom,
eat. Okay? We need you</i>.” <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
This is nice. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I can do this.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
No time with a
walker.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
No time with a wheel
chair. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
No time. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Hospice. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Hospice. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Hospice. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I am sorry Mom</i>.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I am really sorry. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Can you hear me?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I love you too</i>.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Thank you Mom. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Thank you.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
There is no time. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Obituary. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Eulogy. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Waves of knowing.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Mom would like that-
oh. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
God. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I forgot to show you
Chloe’s art.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Maya has a song for
you. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
God. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I don’t know what to
do. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
We weren’t finished. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Please. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Ugh. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I miss you. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Work. Dishes. Emails.
Phone calls. Laundry. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I am behind. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Oh, look. Mom would like that.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
God. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-14863509383748516782015-05-04T11:35:00.000-04:002015-05-05T10:56:29.093-04:00Coping with Things You Think You Can’t Handle: Sixteen Tools to Get You Through<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Coping with Things
You Think You Can’t Handle:<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Sixteen Tools to Get
You Through<o:p></o:p></div>
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<span id="goog_2095847034"></span><span id="goog_2095847035"></span><br />
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I remember in eighth grade when the doctor told my mom, dad,
and me that my baby brother Stephen had Down Syndrome. That day I had gotten
out of school early and my dad took me with him to see the baby. As a result, I
think I ended up hearing the news around the same time as my dad. It may have
been the first time for my mom too. My memories of that moment are altered.
Time was slow. I was watching my parents more than listening to the doctor. My
mom was crying, my dad stoic. I heard things like trisomy 21 and mental
retardation. Something shifted. The way my brain processed input was distorted
for a while. I was 13 and completely overwhelmed.<o:p></o:p></div>
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We knew nothing about Down Syndrome (read more here http://www.ndss.org)<o:p></o:p></div>
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When dad and I got home, he told my sisters and brother. I
remember that we all held each other and cried. We had no idea what this meant-
at all. As it turns out, my bother Stephen is an amazing human being. Everyone
who knows him loves him. It was going to be okay, even better than okay. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBysKFFEX4dQJwa3YRR8nPamQvEJjjnONkjIuv0inZgcPyWHMuELov5nBXhofZB695RbAZhbxUuaHjWyX3sMLNZoVFkqjp1NY0vUR48qE7PPaMCtlMIvZm12NMTH4DHXd0yBIf88JHdXbl/s1600/IMG_8421.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBysKFFEX4dQJwa3YRR8nPamQvEJjjnONkjIuv0inZgcPyWHMuELov5nBXhofZB695RbAZhbxUuaHjWyX3sMLNZoVFkqjp1NY0vUR48qE7PPaMCtlMIvZm12NMTH4DHXd0yBIf88JHdXbl/s320/IMG_8421.png" height="320" width="180" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Stephen Cook</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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This was, however, one of my first experiences with
unexpected, overwhelming, and soul-wrenching news that I honestly wasn’t sure I
could handle. As life is the way it is there would be (and will be) more times
like this. <o:p></o:p></div>
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For example, we moved many times when I was little, before
the Internet and Facebook- back then- you literally lost many of your fiends
when you moved. My grandparents have passed. My swim coach from middle and high
school, a test pilot in the military, was suddenly killed in a plane crash. My
high school boyfriend that I thought I would marry, wasn’t ready for that (and
I found out the hard way). I left my first marriage. I have lost beloved pets.
When I was pregnant with Maya, the doctors told us there was the possibility
that she might have Down Syndrome (days later we found out that she didn’t). My
mom very recently passed away due to pulmonary fibrosis. Life altering stuff
has happened. And, this is not all of it (some things simply must be kept
private and sometimes those ones are the hardest). <o:p></o:p></div>
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I am not special. <o:p></o:p></div>
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You have these moments too. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The hard part for me is that these are not discrete moments.
It is not like they happen one moment and then they are gone, passed. Your life
changes- forever. The result is prolonged periods of intense feeling and
processing. I have experienced them to last many months- the hard ones much
longer- during which there are penetrating, stop-you-in-your-tracks waves of powerful
feelings. There are also waves of remembering the way things used to be and
awareness of exactly how much things have changed. This contrast hits you, yeah
it hits you, as a sharp, hard reminder of how your life has been forever
altered. These hits are accompanied by images, thoughts, and breath-taking,
literally breath-taking, waves of emotions. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The thoughts that run through my mind include these
particularly hard ones, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“I don’t know if I am ever going to feel
okay again”</i></b> and <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“I wonder if I will ever be authentically
happy again.” <o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGp4rnSgUerk8whdfB22hFhsOTnqZiuMPLruLFoYq3L4MtjQj8ga-UWoJxicQXMu_acLrIqcazOYNs7063jHEpcGuPthJhueV4GB6lRrp04jsba_NvIQbnhCF9xgfqF2LUvxunQpd9IMWV/s1600/signpost.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGp4rnSgUerk8whdfB22hFhsOTnqZiuMPLruLFoYq3L4MtjQj8ga-UWoJxicQXMu_acLrIqcazOYNs7063jHEpcGuPthJhueV4GB6lRrp04jsba_NvIQbnhCF9xgfqF2LUvxunQpd9IMWV/s200/signpost.jpg" height="200" width="146" /></a></div>
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Here is the thing. Know that these questions <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">do
not signify reality</i></b> (i.e. the truth is you are going to feel okay and
happy again). Rather, they let you know where you are. They are signposts. When
you see these signposts, you are in a hard place and you need support. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Here are some tips on how to get out of your hard place.
These are not make-it-better tips. They are not escape tips. They are- <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">THE
WAY OUT IS THROUGH</i></b> tips. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Rally your best self.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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Research suggests that if you coach yourself with
self-compassionate, caring encouragement using your own name, you providing
self-support that can move you forward. This is how it works, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Catherine, I hear you saying that you are
afraid that you will never feel okay again. I see your sadness. Remember,
Catherine, you are strong. You have your breath and your practice. You have
made it through hard times and learned and grown. Be present, feel, and breathe.
You’ve got this.”</i><o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Look for those who have made it and lock your eyes on them.</i></b> <o:p></o:p></div>
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By the time my brother Stephen had grown a bit and was doing
well in school, my mom went back to school to get her teaching degree. Sharing
the writing gene, she wrote about our family experiences and the birth of Stephen.
She wrote about Stephens’ birth and meeting a woman who also had a son with
Down Syndrome. Her name was Eileen Hyslop. Mom reached out to her. Eileen
generously talked to my mom at length and later became her dear friend. That
first day on the phone, my mom could barely hear what Eileen was saying because
she just heard her laugh, from the belly, from the soul, an authentic, happy laugh.
The sound of that laugh gave my mom hope. My mom thought for the first time, in
a long time, that maybe she would, in fact, feel okay again and maybe, in fact,
she would laugh, a real laugh again. Find those who have made it through and
lock your eyes on them. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Let your friends and family be there. <o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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The days after I told my partner of seven years that I was
leaving were some of the hardest days of my life. I knew he deserved to be with
someone who loved him completely and I knew I needed to leave. That did not
mean that I didn’t love him very much. I did and leaving him was one of the
hardest things I have even done. I was floored by the feelings that followed.
One night, I felt as if I could not bear to exist. I didn’t want to die, but I
didn’t know if I could handle being present in all I was feeling. My dear
friend Lissa came over to my place with a novel in hand. The television was
off, no music, just me curled up on the couch and Lissa sitting on the chair
next to me reading. I didn’t know the story. To this day, I have no idea what
she was reading. Still, the sound of her voice and knowing I was not alone, got
me through one of the hardest nights of my life. I will be forever grateful. Reach
out to the people in your life, your sisters and brothers, family, good
friends- those that won’t mind sitting and reading to you while you work on
breathing. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Listen to the stories and perspectives of others.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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This one was my daughter Chloe’s contribution. When I asked
her what she does to get through the seemingly unbearable, she said she reaches
out to others to get their perspective. She said that when she is too deep in
something, she loses perspective and only sees one side. When she reaches out
and listens, she hears other perspectives and possibilities. It has a balancing
effect. She says it gets her closer to what is really happening and out of her
reaction. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I guess old souls can be 16
year-old girls.</i> With a similar intention, the year I turned 40 I re-storied
my whole life in a series of journals. I interviewed my husband, my parents, my
siblings, and my friends and got their stories of my life. I detailed things
that made no sense to me when I was little and asked very specific questions. All
the notes are in journals that I still hold precious today. This process was incredibly
healing and “self”-organizing. I learned so much about my own perceptions as
well as the sides of stories that perhaps I could never have known or
understood as a kid. Not surprisingly, I was out-and-out wrong about more than
a few things. The whole process made me stronger, deeper, more connected and
integrated.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Routine is your friend.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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When my Grandpa Cook died it hit me hard. He was the first
of my grandparents to pass. He meant a lot to me. He was a teacher to me on
topics ranging from how to recover from an eating disorder to maintenance of
healthy daily routines. I somehow felt safe just thinking about him digging around
his garden, making insane smoothies, and sitting and reading. To get through
his death, I stuck to my routine. I went to school. I went to work. I ran (no
yoga yet in my life at this time). My routine was my anchor. I said to myself, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Work is still here,”</i> “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">School is still here,”</i> and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Daily runs are still here.”</i> <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Things had changed substantially and yet so
much was going to stay the same. I found great comfort in that. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Use your planner, calendar, or other scheduling support technology.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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In the research world, these are called cognitive prosthetics
(or neuro-prosthetics). Considered a tool for improved functioning, technologies
can help you “think” just as a prosthetic leg can help someone who has lost a
limb walk. For example, researchers are exploring ways that technological tools
can help those with Alzheimer’s function day-to-day. How does this relate? When
we are completely overwhelmed, we are at high risk for flaking out. Under
stress, your brain is flooded with stress hormones and there is actual risk for
cognitive impairment. Use your tools and give your brain a break so that it can
process what you are experiencing. You can enhance the process by adding in
reminders to do deep breathing exercises or reminders of positive affirmations
(e.g., an auto-reminder pops up to say, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“You
are stronger than you think you are. Breathe”</i>). Technology is a powerful
tool for mental health. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Let your feelings move through you and breathe- breathe deeply. <o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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You can’t think your way out of some things. It is simply
not possible. When someone dies, you can’t fix it, think about it differently,
nothing like that. It is loss, pure loss. It can’t be fixed. You can try to
think your way out of it- that path takes you into loops of rumination- because
it doesn’t really work. The feelings demand to be felt. As they wave in, allow
them. Put one hand on your belly and one hand on your heart. Feel. Deepen your
breath and stay present. These feelings are called emotions, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">e-motions</i></b>-
packets of energy and information (i.e., /e/) that move through you (i.e.,
/motion/). They tell us what matters. The remind us what is important. They
move us. Allowing and presence is needed for integration and processing of what
has happened. It’s a necessity. That said, take breaks. Alternate sessions of
being totally and completely in it with periods of support, friends, and
healthy distractions. When you are ready, allow again. That old saying is true,
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“In
order to heal, we need to feel.”</i></b><o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Stay Sober.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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There is another old saying (from Alcoholics Anonymous),
“Nothing is so bad a drink won’t make it worse.” You don’t need to be an
alcoholic to benefit from that wisdom. Your brain and soul need to be sober to
process important things in your life. If you take yourself out with alcohol or
drugs during the hard times, you rob yourself of the chance too honor the
tragedy, loss, or important life event with pure, sober presence. Equally important,
if you drink, or use, every time you start to feel, it is difficult, if not impossible
to move forward. You get stuck. It bears repeating, that old saying is true, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“In
order to heal, we need to feel.”<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Write, write, write.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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Writing about hard times can help you heal (read a
Psychology Today Piece here <a href="http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/write-yourself-well/201208/expressive-writing">http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/write-yourself-well/201208/expressive-writing</a>).
James Pennebaker, as researcher on the mental health benefits of writing found
that when individuals write about difficult events in their lives, include
specific details, and integrate their emotional experiences, they experience
increased physical and emotional well-being (read about James Pennebaker here <a href="http://www.utexas.edu/features/archive/2005/writing.html">http://www.utexas.edu/features/archive/2005/writing.html</a>).<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> </i></b>For
me, writing in my journal, writing a blog, or any writing at all are ways for
me to move thoughts and ideas through me. I love giving seemingly free-floating
emotions a home on a page- whether it be a webpage or a hand-made journal page.
My emotions seem to do better with a good home. Write, write, write. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Seek out nature.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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Nature is medicine. Researchers are confirming what we all
already know: getting into nature is grounding, spiritually uplifting, and
healthy. I believe so strongly in this that I run to a local waterfall on a
regular basis. If I don’t get there once a week, I feel it in my body. I love
hearing the water rush over the rocks. I love seeing the trees grow and shed
their leaves, hearing the snow crunch under my feet in the winter, and smelling
the flowers in the spring. I love the birds, squirrels, and ducks that live
there. Once when we were in the midst of moving, I ran to the falls in a state
of exasperation with the unpacking. Sweaty, exhausted, I walked up to see the
falls, and rested my hands and chin on the safety fence. At that moment, I saw
the most beautiful thing. A blue heron was standing at the base of the falls
dipping his bill in the water and then looking up to the sky. Somehow, I knew
in that movement that everything was going to be okay. I didn’t take a picture.
I hold the image of that heron clearly in my memories embedded with feelings of
calm security. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The two weeks of my mom’s death, I ran or walked down to
Lyon’s Falls, the actual falls. I watched the water fall over the rocks. I made
wishing stone stacks. I noticed the roots on trees and the moss on rocks. I
felt the sand on my fingers and the softness of the sides of the riverbed under
my feed. I breathed in the fresh, snow-tinged spring air, and I cried. Yep,
nature heals. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The next possible thing.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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When I was an undergraduate, I did not love to clean my
apartment. I would be busy on swim team, school, and work and get over my head
with housekeeping. One Saturday morning I woke up knowing I had to get my
apartment in order. It had gone too far and something had to be done. I felt
frozen by the sheer magnitude of what I had to accomplish. I asked myself, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Catherine, what is the next possible thing
you can do?”</i> I answered, “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">You can put
your feet on the floor and get out of bed.”</i> I answered myself, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Yes, yes that seems possible.”</i> And so
it began. I asked myself if I could get this cup, this one cup, to the kitchen
sink and I answered myself that I could, in fact, do that. One little, tiny
thing at a time, I got my apartment clean. This strategy has come to serve me
in postpartum after a spinal headache and complicated recovery. It came to
serve me for many, many days when I was terrified that I would not get tenure
(I did). It served me writing my last book (e.g., <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“I can write this section, just this section”</i>). In Alcoholics
Anonymous they talk about one day at a time. For me, on some days, that is too
big. I ask, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“What is the next possible thing
you can do?”</i> That’s it. Do that. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Schedule pleasant events.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Since the 1980s, researchers have been documenting the benefits
of scheduling pleasant events. It is important that you see the two aspects of
this tool: (a) schedule, and (b) pleasant event. Each component is important.
In fact, planning the pleasant event (e.g., a vacation) may have as much, or
more, of a benefit than the actual pleasant event. Read the New York Times piece
on the benefits of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">planning </i>vacation <a href="http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/02/18/how-vacations-affect-your-happiness/?_r=0">http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/02/18/how-vacations-affect-your-happiness/?_r=0</a>.
Next, the pleasant event is- well- pleasant. You don’t need to earn it or
deserve it. It is just healthy to do fun and nourishing things. I love to go
for a run in nature or hike. I love to go in our hot tub. I love to cuddle in
by the fireplace and write blogs. I love teaching yoga. I love group runs with
friends. I love yoga trainings (my brother said that I need to admit this is
yoga camp for grown-ups- I say training makes it sound legit). I plan “trainings”
and travel. I have been saving for and planning a trip to Italy for almost 5
years. I hope to go this year, completely paid-for, no credit card debt, and
learn to cook authentic Italian meals in all different regions. Just thinking
about it makes me happy. (Go here for a list of pleasant events http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/html/er_handout_8.html)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Practice and all is coming.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When I found out my mom had Pulmonary Fibrosis, I deepened
my yoga practice. I recall sobbing in savasana with Susan Fain, the yoga
teacher, playing “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Awaken My Soul”</i> as
she gently pressed my shoulders to the floor (thank God for towels over the
eyes). Practice yoga, run, swim, or whatever physical practice centers you. The
act of being in your body and moving is essential and powerful. Recall the
section on emotions needing to move?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You
need to move too. You move, the emotions move, and integration of even the
hardest of stuff happens. Unlike substance use, a practice that allows you to
feel your body and your feelings allows the impact of hard times move through
you. Warning: each of these physical practices, if done with the wrong intention-
can work just like alcohol or drugs. You can use your yoga, your running, your
swimming to numb out the feelings- and if you do- well- re-read the section on
staying sober. It’s not a step forward. So move- YES- and move with the
intention of feeling and processing. Now, that will serve you. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Meditate.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Start mediating today so that when you need the skills you
have them. During the last weeks of my mom’s life, we had the privilege of
taking care of her. Thanks to Hospice and their wonderful care providers we
were able to be at my parents’ home providing the care my mom needed. These
times are so very important and hard. I was able to use the skills I have
practiced for years- breathing, mantra, and focus- to stay present and
experience all that there was to experience. You see, the more you meditate,
the more you have a felt sense that everything really is going to be okay no
matter what is happening. You have a felt sense that we are all one and that we
all come from and go to the same place and that place is calm and full of love.
Each day you practice you allow yourself to get a closer- not to believing
this, but knowing it. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Allow.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I am not about acceptance. Maybe for some things- for
others- no. There are things I do not and will not accept. However, I have
found it to be good practice to allow. Allow others to be on their own path.
Don’t let your judgment, your ideas, your concepts about where they should be
and how they should be doing things to get in the way of love and presence. It
has taken me a while to get to this and it is my practice. Allow. Allow. Allow.
And then Love. Love. Love. I promise, you will not regret this. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Look for meaning.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This one takes a commitment to dharma- the concept that we
were each born with a reason for being and it is our path to find our reason
and express it. Seane Corn, a teacher of yoga, explains that the universe is
our teacher- always. She says that our souls are placed here on Earth to learn
and the life events that manifest as we move form day-to-day and year-to-year
are there to be our teachers. In my life, I have a sense that the universe does
not speak English, or any other human language for that matter. Rather, the
universe speaks in symbols and energy. That means that the universe is not
going to walk up to you and say, “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Catherine,
your brother Stephen was born to show you the beauty, love, and intelligence in
all human beings</i>.” Nope, I had to see, witness, share, experience, and
value all of that. There were no words. Just Stephen. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So there you are: the sixteen tools. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The way out is through</i></b>
and getting through can be manageable. It is not easy, but it can be simple-
stay present and process- and know you and your beautiful life are worth the
effort. Your ability to stay present and move through the experience is a way
of honoring those involved. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It is a way of honoring the journey of your own soul. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I hope you choose the path of presence. You are stronger
than you think and life is more beautiful than we can remember in the hard
times. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The way out is through. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Namaste, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Catherine Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8YbVFQPn61Ws8SF8BJHybedFO9iFsQ6Nrg-yFfH0Z1-T1mBD0IzeVxlPESn8ufrOBTOVdfkXuL_zy6jBIj1OP9QRK620z0oroRq3xhK-LThGX_9Ob31ksCxLU5Qp_2IHkeWoipZvUMR5m/s1600/Catherine+Cottone+Dancer.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8YbVFQPn61Ws8SF8BJHybedFO9iFsQ6Nrg-yFfH0Z1-T1mBD0IzeVxlPESn8ufrOBTOVdfkXuL_zy6jBIj1OP9QRK620z0oroRq3xhK-LThGX_9Ob31ksCxLU5Qp_2IHkeWoipZvUMR5m/s320/Catherine+Cottone+Dancer.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
P.S. Love you Mom<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2751078146604357329.post-48452081407033424232015-04-26T22:43:00.000-04:002015-04-26T22:48:44.012-04:00How Do You Say Goodbye to Your Mom? <div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">How Do You Say Goodbye to Your Mom?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Catherine
Cook-Cottone<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
The Yoga Bag<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I like to follow the instructions. I like to read the books.
I want the answer, the right way. Give me the 10 steps, the empirically
supported intervention, the best practice. I have Googled, asked, reviewed, and
searched key terms like grief, Hospice, and life-after-death. Apparently, there
is no amount of information that can help me do this. I can’t seem to think my
way out of this one. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">For some things, there just aren’t any answers. It just is. It just
hurts. <o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There are these moments. Her obituary comes across Facebook
as a student remembers her. One of my sisters or brothers texts how much they
are missing her. Sometimes that is me; “I miss mom,” I text. An innocent scroll
through my photos that brings up an image of mom. I walk by a store and, “Mom
would love that” runs through my mind. All these, each followed by a deep and
heavy hurt. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Sometimes, I don’t see them coming. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Then, the really hard parts. The fights you got into in high
school. The things you said and didn’t say. You know, I wanted to show her
Chloe’s latest art and I forgot to grab it before I left. I forgot. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It hurts to breathe. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I told her goodbye. I said I was sorry. I told her I loved
her a million times throughout her life and during those last days. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">For some things, there is no amount of talking that helps. It just is.
It just hurts. <o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I have been busy. But that doesn’t help me say goodbye. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">For some things, there is no amount of busy that helps. It just is. It
just hurts. <o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
How do you say goodbye to your mom?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When there are no answers, maybe you are asking the wrong
question. More, maybe it’s not a question at all. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Maybe, just maybe, you are not supposed to say goodbye.
Goodbye is something we can do. It is something that might fix things. I have
done it many times through lovers or friends. It gets too hard- goodbye. Easy.
Done. All fixed. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Mom, you and all of our feelings and loves and fights and
connections and disconnections- were not meant to be fixed. They just are. Some
of it is deeply agonizing, a piercing pain, and some of it is nothing short of
sunlight almost caught in a just-fallen drop of rain, whispering on a rose
petal. The way you loved Stephen and dressed up for dinner with Dad. The way you
ruminated about the one student who wasn’t journaling in English class and the
inventive ways you could reach her. The way you watched movies as if you were
dancing on an over-turned boat, singing in the rain, protecting a mouse in a
fist, and waiting for your lover to show up, sky-high in Seattle. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Sunlight in rain, on roses. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I think God, the universe, wants to me to do something else
this time. Something beyond, bigger than, outside of- saying goodbye. I think I
am being asked to stay. To stay present with and to all of it- the deep, chest
pressing, gut wrenching, loss- the melancholy missing of your romantic,
idealized, if-only approach to life- the ache for conversations I wanted to
embody with you and now will be ephemeral, in spirit- the hoping and working
toward believing that you can see how amazing my daughters are today and will
be tomorrow. Mom, Chloe had a great game and you should hear Maya sing…. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So, no goodbye. I am here in all of it. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I need time though. Sorry Mom, I can’t bake cookies yet. Not
yet. It would feel too much like saying goodbye. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When I do, will you help me? <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Cath. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Catherine Cook-Cottonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14343387587745144952noreply@blogger.com0